Bill Harper on "Shock to the System"...

 Original Airdate: 9-30-10

Over the summer, the question I was most often asked about Grey’s was:  “How do you come back from something like that?”   These people weren’t asking me about the show, or the writers, they were asking about the characters.  The characters they know and like as if they were their own friends:  How will they come back from that?   Well, as of last week, Grey’s is back, but for our doctors, I think that question is still valid.  

 If you’ve ever lost someone, or been terribly hurt, I think it’s fair to say that no matter how good a job you’ve done grieving, no matter far you’ve gotten past the pain, you’re never really safe from feeling that loss again. You run across a picture.  A thing they gave you. You hear a song, or someone says a phrase, and suddenly that loss and pain is as present and immediate as if it was happening right now.  It’s a shock, a complete surprise and, like the original event itself, something you can never see coming, never prepare yourself for.  Because a trauma this immense doesn’t heal quickly.  It creates wounds so deep they won’t make themselves known for a long time to come.  And when they do, they blindside you.  

Last week, we saw how our doctors were trying to come back :  From rushing at life to grasping at love, to going mad, to posturing, to hiding from the pain, we saw the ways they were trying, and sometimes failing, to push through and heal.  But they’re not even really healing yet.  They’re coping.  

Cristina and Owen came together through trauma -- they met when he scooped an injured Cristina off the ER bay.  Then she saw Owen through his post-war struggles.   It seems almost inevitable that their wedding would also come out of trauma.   But after being so badly hurt in what is arguably her favorite place in the world – the O.R. --  Cristina barely knows herself now, that’s the reason she would be content to let Owen take the driver’s seat.  She can trust him, he’s the only thing she can count on right now.  But when his plan goes so horribly wrong in the OR --  when lightning strikes the same place twice -- she can no longer trust any of his decisions, or her own…She mistrusts the very impulse to marry him.   Her first, unavoidable instinct is to reverse everything she’s done.  

Alex is coping too, keeping that bullet in his chest like a badge of honor.  But it’s all posturing, the bravado, and the carelessness with which he talks about the health risks…All a front.  Because, though he doesn’t make a lot of noise about it, Alex isn’t a guy who lets himself off the hook very easily.  And Bailey’s right:  that bullet in his chest is a reminder – a constant token of his survivor’s guilt.  When Bailey finally relieves him of that burden, it’s a relief for not just her, but I hope that Alex gets to leave the guilt behind, too.  And maybe he can stop coping and start healing.

Lexie was losing sleep over the trauma, literally, to the extent that her incredibly hardworking mind is overtaxed to the breaking point.  But she’s picking herself up, trying to move on.  Unfortunately, she’s forced to do battle against the stigma of being the one who fell apart.  And sadly, Mark is the biggest casualty in that battle.  He’s got the right intention – he’s trying to protect her, be strong for her, basically, he just wants to love her.  Unfortunately, right now, what Lexie really needs to feel is that she’s the strongest person in her life.   

Callie and Arizona are certainly moving on -- facing the realities of taking It to the Next Level, where you really share your space, where no one is a guest in the place, and you find that you’re creating a whole new place for the pair of you, rather than the two of you.  This is a series of tiny, difficult negotiations that add up to one giant leap for a couple.  Of course, a disagreement about wall color is not life-and-death for their relationship.  It’s a hitch.  But it’s the beginning of a lot of give-and–take between two really strong women, and it will be great fun to watch where that goes.

Finally, Derek and Meredith… 

Derek is still living dangerously, in the OR and out of it.  I like his speech to the Chief about driving.  For one thing, Patrick Dempsey’s own passion for racing comes through pretty clearly in that speech.  But hopefully, it illuminates a little what he’s been after by racking up all these speeding tickets: it’s all about losing and regaining control, especially after his life went so completely out of control in the end of last season.

And Meredith’s going through a similar struggle.  Keeping herself busy by looking after everyone else, trying to make sure Alex is okay, that Cristina’s okay, that Lexie is okay, unable to see that the reason she’s not cleared for surgery is because she’s been refusing to attend to the deepest injury she received that day, the miscarriage.   It’s only when she admits it to Derek, that she can move past it; that she can admit that she has so little control over anything.  I think it’s interesting that at the same moment that Cristina’s marriage is breaking apart as a result of the shooting, Meredith’s is getting stronger, as many great partnerships are strengthened by adversity.  And it’s why Mer tells Cristina, basically, that whatever mistakes she’s made, being with Owen is not one of them.  And that she should stick.   I’m really glad she does.  

 

Comments

[joy]

this episode was totally hilarious and i'm glad to see meredith back at the
center. i love her training april to not be so annoying, because april is
VERY annoying. I also love mer's strength in helping Cristina. Some really
funny lines tonight. derek's reaction to his night in jail was hilarious, but mer's way of dealing with him was even more hilarious.

i really don't understand why meredith and derek only got a quick scene for her to tell him about the miscarriage. more time was given to other couples, like teddy and her bf, and mark and lexie, than was given to meredith and derek. when the miscarriage happened everyone was
upset and we were promised it would be dealt with well. i hope that happens soon because this episode did not do it justice at all and i was very disappointed with how limited the time spent on it was. i hope it's discussed more in future episodes because it was basically the most painful thing meredith fans have had to suffer through.

mark and callie drinking skanky wine out of a bottle- totally hilarious.

[Skylar]

Loved this episode. Sandra was amazing!

[Jennifer]

Brilliant episode! Loved that you focused on the main characters - Mer/Der, Cristina/Owen, Alex, Bailey and Lexie! Cristina had me in tears most of the episode but so delighted that Owen came back for her at Mer's house and declared he was going to let her face this on her own cause she was there for him thru his dark time. LOVE CRISTINA and OWEN - definitely not a mistake. These two are just pure love, can't wait to see Owen be Cristina's support system as she fights her way back.

[Maria]

Thank you for giving us S5 Cristina and Owen back! The couple that despite all the pain and obstacles plows ahead cause of their love. I know Cristina can find herself again because she has a great support system in Meredith and Owen.

[Erin]

This episode was amazing.

Loved that Owen was prepared for Cristina to freak out when she woke up! LOL Hearing Owen talk about soapy sex and his desire to wash Cristina's hair almost rendered me incoherent.

Even though it ended up being a terrible thing cause it triggered a flashback for Cristina, it was nice to see that Owen was trying to get her back on the horse and support her. He could not forsee what happened.

It broke my heart watching Cristina give Owen her ring back but in that moment she felt Owen/surgery let her down and it was all wrong.

But so happy, that Owen showed up all gallantly and spouted that he understood what Cris was going through. She had been there for him through his darkest times and he doesnt plan on going anywhere without her! WOW - that is the C/O we missed from S5! And Mer's face was priceless during his speech, she had not seen C/O interact and it was too perfect. And I love Mer's quip to Owen. LOL

Also loved Meredith faking tears to get back on surgery rounds.

Meredith is a great best friend and she handled Cristina beautifully.

So happy she finally told Derek about the miscarriage.

Bailey and Alex scene was awesome too.

I could go on and on because whole episode was great. The only exceptions for me was could careless about Teddy/psychiatrist. I really hope the focus stays on the original characters and newbies are supporting characters. Don't really want details on them - Teddy, Avery, and April

[lisa]

ok Bill awesome episode!! CRISTINA LOVES OWEN!! life is a struggle and I love seeing these to moving through it 2gether.

[karsyn]

SEASON 7 is the greys i know and love. Really WOW. and Sandra Oh, is by far the best actor on television, anywhere around!! #EMMY Loved Mer and Cristina this week! and i just love Callie and Mark as well-if all i can have is a bff between them ill take it. loved tonights episode Thank you

[Caroline]

Oh, how I love Owen and Cristina! Even under the most difficult of circumstances they are just pure love.

[alanna]

Cristina loves Owen enough said!! i know it and those who dont are watching some other show. cant wait to see them work through Cristinas trauma

[McMedstudent]

I almost loved ur blog more than the episode and that is a compliment

[Tina]

Sandra Oh was flippin amazing!!! Look forward to Cristina finding her way this season and so happy that Cristina is going to stick to Owen to help her get through this. Their tortured lovestory is so captivating and just full of love.

[nichole]

This was the episode I was looking for. Last week, everyone seemed like they were ok when we, the viewers, knew they weren't It was great to see them facing thier personal issues but also how their issues were affecting everyone else.

Great writing for sure.

[Ana M.]

Bill,

Oh...where to start? I thought this was a pretty great episode. It was funny, it was dark, it was very Grey's in essence.
With two very big exceptions:

The miscarriage scene. It was all wrong. PD sold the scene with his eyes but he could've said more than "I would've helped...".

Second, Teddy Altman and April Kepner are putting me in my limits.These two are making me dread this show. This show that made it impossible to wait for Thursdays.

Also, I'll add my huge dislike for Owen. He's making Burke look better by the day.

Other than that, the fab 5 scene of them watching Wheel of Fortune? WIN. Mer & Cris were the best part of the show. Hat's off there to you. What a great job. Derek talking about the speeding, all PD in there. Love it. Mark and Callie should be together. That last scene of them drinking wine was beyond great. More of that. And ask Derek to join them. Should be fun!

Thanks.

[Jenna]

Thanks for the blog! Also, as always, I loved the episode. It's painful for me to watch Christina so hurt because man did she come into her own and kick ass in the finale, AND out of all the characters I love, I really LOVE Christina and Sandra Oh's portrayal of her. It's painful to watch her lose Christina again...more than she did after Burke and ouch throwing the curve ball of the patient mentioning him to her tonight! But I have faith that she'll come back fighting and continue to kick hard-core cardio ass! :) I'm so glad Meredith told, and so glad Alex let Bailey take the bullet out and so glad Lexi is healing and Arizona and Callie are as amazing as ever. Ouch on Mark but again, I have faith in Mark and Lexi. I love them too. Thank you all for another wonderful episode and a hour of indulgence every Thursday! Keep up the good work :)

[Tina]

If you all keep episodes like this coming Season 7 could easily become my favorite season ever.

[B]

I am so glad that Cristina went home with Owen. Mer may have pointed out that she didn't make a mistake marrying him, but what Owen said was also very important. I was scared for a minute that Cristina was really going to bail, but if anyone can understand what she's experiencing, it's him. She really does need him, and I don't think she's used to really needing anyone - well, except Mer, but that's a safe kind of need. She's going to be so fundamentally changed by all this, I'm really interested to see how differently she's shaped on the other end.

Boy, when Meredith heals, she really heals. Granted, she had a setback with the miscarriage and withheld again, but she did get to it, and came back strong and whole again. I loved that Derek accepted it without berating her for not telling him sooner. I am also very interested to see where they go from here. I love them together and strong.

Loved Bailey and Alex together, moving on a little bit with each other's help. Also loved Mer telling Alex that he wasn't a lightening rod for crazy, but really, Alex has suffered enough. He needs a real break, so please stop hurting him.

I really hope Mark hangs in there and will wait for Lexie. He's come a long way, too, and hopefully Callie's words about taking the steps rather than skipping them will stick with him.

I appreciate seeing those smaller steps with Callie and Arizona, the everyday issues that might seem small but are still important.

Great episode!

[Lil]

I really enjoyed this episode. It was so, so much better then last week's, and gave much more clear insight into the character's reactions.

Loved every scene with Mer and Cristina. They're always great together, but were pitch perfect in this episode.

Loved every scene with Owen and Cris, too. They have such an interesting story to tell this season, and I'm excited to watch it unfold.

Loved all the Alex/Bailey scenes, too, especially when he was talking about Percy and Reed with her. I agree that it was great for both of them, and I loved how Alex did what she wanted once she asked, in the way he ususally does. So fitting and true to both characters.

I loved the Meredith/Alex scene, too; those two are always, always perfect together.

Still have no idea why Teddy is still around, and Lexi's vapid, never ending speeches continue to grate like fingernails on a chalk board. But I loved the mention of Burke, too; great way to fill in Cris' story.

Overall, I really liked this episode, and unlike last week, I am really looking forward to the next episode. Nice to have Grey's back.

[Juliet]

I don't mind the angsty scenes with Cristina/Owen as long as they keep true to their lovestory. Cristina stood strong for Owen despite his ups/downs, I look forward to the reverse. I will be cheering these two on and hope Cristina finds her love for surgery again.

Look forward to McBaby drama - hope it doesn't take all season for Derek/Meredith to conceive again.

[KS-California]

I loved (most) of this episode. The first scene with Owen being so comically, and sexily, prepared for Cristina's freakout was priceless - he really does know her better than anyone. (Next time can we actually see the shower scene - please?) That said, at the same time, just like many people who love you and want you to be at your best, sometimes they push you - and Owen knows that what Cristina has always loved is surgery. I think he's hyper conscious of making sure she doesn't lose pieces of herself and I think he's worried that she will lose something if she stays away too long. Also, surgery, for him was one of the things that helped him cope when he was having his struggles. Unfortunately, it did not go at all as planned - poor Owen, can at least one of his good deeds go unpunished? (Of course, if Owen hadn't tried to get her back into the OR, people would have accused him of holding Cristina back.)

I also love that Owen is never defensive, he always admits when he's made a mistake and tries to do better. He accepts what Cristina says to him when she gives the ring back and doesn't try to stop her - he knows the strong woman he married.

But I absolutely love that Owen is not a doormat, either. That he is willing to fight for their love. And I can't imagine anything better than someone allowing you to have time to figure things out -- not giving an ultimatum or a timeline, but just stating that they are going to be there and that they love you no matter what. This really is one of the most exciting couples I've ever seen on the small or big screen -- the only couple that actually conveys real emotion and mature love.

Wonderful first scene for Meredith - very funny. And nice Meredith/Cristina scene at the end.

Nice Bailey/Alex scenes.

Always enjoy Mark and Callie together.

I have characters I dislike intensely but will keep quiet because we got a couple of scenes where Owen and Cristina actually got to talk to each other - hurray!

[Tammi]

Wow, my heart was breaking for Cristina! Sandra Oh knocked it out of the park as usual. I want to see Cristina be able to have both of the loves of her life - Owen and surgery. My favorite part was Owen's speech at the end. It reminded me of the We Matter speech and he basically thanked Cristina for being there for him. Cristina gave so selfishly to Owen during his time of need, and it is rightfully so to see Owen be there to guide her thru her difficult time.

[joan]

mark's supposedly proposal speech was the best one i ever heard. too bad lexie didn't get to hear it because she took mark's protectiveness in a wrong way. i just want them to be together again!!! PLEASE???? make all the mexie/slexie fans happy!!!

[Lexie]

I've always really loved Lexie and Mark as a couple and it broke my heart at the end to see her tell him to leave her alone especially after his beautiful speech he had lined up, but I totally agree with why she needs space. She needs to find strength in herself or else she'll always be relying on someone else to save her. Super excited about the future for them though! The writing in this show completel blows my mind.

[Jenny]

Another great ep. The best part was the end, in my opinion. Owen's speech, Christina's reaction, Mer's line to Owen about his speech. It was all chillingly good.

[lothiriel]

so do we have to lose hope abt mark and lexie being back together?? I love them, but seriously this is hard to watch !

[Em]

It was overall a pretty good episode and I can say I enjoyed it much more than the premiere. However, it left me immensely disappointed again. There was such a long dramatic build-up to the scene where Meredith tells Derek about the miscarriage, and yet I can’t help feeling that you didn’t exactly deliver it in a satisfying manner. It lasted seconds and was strangely unemotional on Derek’s side. A friend could have said this to him and the reaction could have been the same. I expected more emotion from him, more pain even, hearing his “wife” has lost a baby. I can’t understand why you couldn’t give more time to Meredith and Derek moment we’ve been all waiting for with such an excitement, yet there was enough screen time to show a fling with a guest character (Teddy/Perkins).