William Harper on "St. Valentine's Day Massacre"...

Original Airdate: 2-11-10

Valentine’s Day! A time for romance, roses, candy, candlelit dinners, roof collapses and heart-shaped boxes of chocolates stolen from comatose patients.  

I know.  The romance can get a little dark and twisty around Seattle Grace.  It’s never going to be candlelight and roses.  Derek can’t get three blocks on a date with his wife without being paged back for a mass casualty.   But honestly, that was the fun of writing this episode; finding all the ways of illuminating romance.  

There’s the tale of unrequited love between Emile and Mrs. Banks, for one.  And Meredith and Alex get sucked in like it’s a chick flick.  Will he?  Won’t he?  Will she?  I think the romance is not just in Emile’s unrequited pining, but in the warmth and comfort that Mrs. Banks has found in decades of marriage to her husband.  I think everything she says to Meredith is true.  Finding the right person, being with them, knowing them so well – and being known -- is romantic.  That’s what Meredith has signed up for, on that post-it note.  But it’s still a scary proposition.  And with the new pressures Derek is facing as Chief, Meredith’s suddenly faced with the question of how she’s reinvented herself in this marriage.  Will it limit her going after her passion, the thing that makes her HER?  And she’s faced with deciding how much she’ll commit to the role, how she’ll allow herself to be defined by it.  In the end, she learns that a marriage, like life, is a constant reinvention.  You choose, over and over again to adapt to each other and with each other, always being clear on what you will and won’t give up to accommodate the other.   Change, adaptation, is what keeps a marriage stable in an unstable world.  

What I love about this story is that, even separately, Derek and Meredith are going through the same struggle.   Being Chief apparently means denying himself his passion – surgery -- as he’s kept from the O.R. all night for a series of more mundane administrative tasks.  I think Derek’s scene in the scrub room with April may be my favorite example of reinvention in the episode, because, to me, it’s the point when Derek becomes the Chief he would want to be, bringing all his compassion and experience to lead and teach.  Despite that, this transition to Chief isn’t going to be easy, professionally or personally.  In the end, they’ll face the struggle together.  Move forward, find a new shape.  That in itself is pretty romantic.  

You know what else is romantic?  The First Date. There’s nothing quite like the crazy, flustered anticipation of the First Date, right?  And how awesome is it that it’s Bailey’s?  It’s sort of shocking how coolly and cruelly Bailey shuts Ben down when he asks her out.  And delightful when we realize its because this nice, attractive, eligible man just dismantles poor Miranda Bailey.  And in the true spirit of Valentine’s Day, Arizona decides to play Cupid and get the ball rolling.  And despite Bailey wanting to KILL her, it works, she gets it together to cough out an acceptance to dinner.  It’s about time Bailey gets to cut loose.  As Lexie says, change is a good thing.   And in this episode, everyone is reinventing themselves.  

Two reinventions I particularly like, because they’re so different, are Lexie’s and Mark’s.  Lexie’s is blatant, and sudden and shocking:  NEW HAIR.  I shaved my head once.  I’m not endorsing this.  But I’d always wanted to know what I’d look like with my hair very VERY short, and I wondered aloud about it one night and my wife said “Let’s do it RIGHT NOW!” and in minutes, clippers were buzzing, clumps of hair were flying, and even halfway through cutting it, she and I both could tell...this was a terrible idea.  Turns out, my head has a shape that is flattered by hair.  Without it, I look like an overturned mixing bowl. “It’ll grow back, ” my wife said, supportively.  And it’s true.  It did.  But that’s essentially what Jackson is saying to Lexie:  New hair is a safe change, because it’s just gonna grow back.  Lexie’s not really committed.  She didn’t do something bold and permanent, like a neck tattoo (I’m not endorsing this, either).  She made the safe change. She’s made a change that’s only skin deep, and temporary. And Jackson calls her on it.  (I love that Jackson reveals this by admitting he was treated as the pretty, dumb one.  And had to reinvent himself).  

But for Lexie, the hair color is different.  For one thing, she looks very good as a blonde  (unlike, say, me with a buzz cut).   And for Lexie, it’s an undeniable step forward – a new look can free you up, can release you to act like someone you’re not.  Or, in her case, act like the person you’ve been hiding inside.  Which might be kind of a badass.  I think keeping the new hair is a first step in Lexie’s transformation, and I can’t wait to see where it goes from here. 

The other reinvention – Mark’s – I love because it’s building over time.  It culminates when he steps up to adopt his newborn grandchild.  In an instant. In a blurt.  He’s wanted a child since we met him – Addison’s --  but he’s spent the time since then maturing -- from man-whore to monogamist, to responsible father to Sloan, then committing to adopt and raise a newborn baby -- to the point where we really want one for him:  He’s grown up a lot.   

Teddy (And Owen) are trying to do maybe the most difficult reinvention of all: to go backward.  What I love about her speech to Owen in the scrub room, is that, not only is it an act of forcing him to acknowledge their friendship, but that we learn so much in that speech about the level of camaraderie and intimacy they shared as friends in the Army.  They apparently talked about everything.  That’s a very difficult thing to give up, and she just flat out refuses to do it.  Can they go back to the way things were?  She and Owen both admit it’s hard to do.  Life moves forward, not backward.   

And so do we.  Next week’s episode, in fact, will give you a glimpse of a Seattle Grace you’ve never seen before, and some stories of our doctors that you never knew happened, even if you’ve been watching from the beginning.  It’s an exhilarating, funny and really moving episode.  So see you back here, then. 

Thanks for reading, and thanks for watching!  

Comments

[Laura]

My fav line in this great epi was Derek's "Yes Dear" in the car! Can't wait for next week.

[Linda]

I miss Izzie. Just hope if you writer her out of the show, it's done in a way Izzie fans can stomach. People complain about Izzie, but she brings a much needed glow to the show.

[Celia]

William you did an awesome job. I loved everything about this episode...loved, loved it and there is really not much else I can say because like you said, my Grey's, which I have been watching from the beginning and have never missed an episode (even those I did not like didn't stop me), is also finally moving forward and I look forward to more and more now. I do request, thought, that we see more passion between Meredith and Derek, please! Look forward to next week.

Thanks so much for bringing the "heart" of Grey's back!

[mel]

Cristina is Owen's best friend!!!!

[Jan]

I don't mean to sound unkind, but besides the fact that Sloan left Seattle (which thrills me to no end), the episode was one of the worst in recent memory.

Mark and the whole grandfather thing is wrong on so many levels. Lexie and the hair and the flings with Alex, ridiculous and not the least bit entertaining.

I loved the opening scene with the docs in the car on their way to dinner. We see far too little of them outside of the hospital; like playing baseball! :) Mer and Der were adorable as ever. I love how Mer has matured and is less whiny. She is happy and it shows.

Love Oweina...they are my favorites. I could watch them all night. Teddy, not so much.

Oh, well. Looking forward to next week.

[Sophie]

I must, as always, restate how much I love Mark and Lexie, so for me--watching Lexie change her hair color was like saying she was moving on, or at the very least, trying to...and I don't want her to move on. Yes, it made her feel different, but not act different, but with a friendly push from Jackson (which by the way reminds me of all the other best friend relationships on the show) she became less mousy. That doesn't necessarily mean she's changed but it's certainly a step. Do I want her to change? In a way, yes, being more assertive is nice. But if her reinvention changes her entirely, maybe not.

And Mark, he's grown up a lot too...but on his own or with Lexie's help? Because in Mark's words, "since YOU, I know for the first time in my life what the right thing is." So I feel like we can't really discount Lexie for contributing to Mark's growth because I think she's definitely a huge part of it. And I don't want to see Mark be this mature and better guy for just anybody...it's gotta be Lexie.

But Mark's stubborn, I know, but here's hoping they'll both realize their relationship is still viable and they can't just let it die. ;)

[Kirea]

I must confess that I liked the writer’s blog more than the episode yesterday.

To me it felt like a correct episode, but nothing special. I think too much administrative Derek for my taste; and that’s boring.

There were some things I liked though.

I liked the trial at taking Cristina and Meredith on a double Valentine’s date, and their frustration at it.

Liked Callie and Arizona teasing Bailey about Gasguy, and that she is getting a date with him. Think the guy is a nice addition.

And yesterday for the first time I liked and felt Mark. He’s finally growing up! Great news! His interactions with Callie were great; she has become my second favorite female character (after Cristina).

Now to what I didn’t like: TEDDY. Sorry, I will have to sue you if I end up breaking my TV while throwing something at her. ;-)

I know you writers love the actress and the character. I know it because you keep repeating it outside the show, interviews, blogs, podcasts… not because you have made her likeable on the show. The woman is pathetic, and seriously mentally ill. Last week she was freaking out seeing Owen close to Cristina; behaving unprofessionally and even bitching poor Avery. This week, she is snow white with deer and puppies (do not make me mention the *ugh* bikini wax). It feels like a quick fix and a cheap trick to try to make everyone like her with a mention of puppies: She likes puppies she must be a lovely person. Seriously?. Are you preparing the scene for a bipolar disorder or a multiple personality? Really soap opera style, but I fear so, while watching this character. Guys, you can do better than that. You can create new characters likeable, like Arizona or GasMan. .You could have made Teddy at least half decent and hardcore. This is a sorry excuse of a professional woman. She has run after Owen like a puppy in every single episode. Even if she stays away from Owen and Cristina from now on, she is still not likeable. And worst: is boring.

What I also missed in this episode was some comedy and also a bit more of screen time for Cristina. She is my favorite character in the show and I missed her.

Looking forward your next episode, I’m sure I’ll like it better :-)

[HeartSleeve in Ocean View]

Love me some New and Improved GA!!!! Really liking the totally new ways you are focusing on the main dudes and debs. Also liking the new allegiances, like Mer and Alex, derek and crybabygirl. Esp love the twisted triangle of yang loves teddy, teddy loves owen, owen loves yang -- spicey goodness! Also liking Alexie-- I liked them back in the george days, good girl and bad boy, so I'm now ambivalent on Mark and Lexie, altho I like Mark when he's with Lexie. Does that mean the only unpaired couple remain Teddy and Mark???? That's an interesting combo!!

Really looking forward to the rest of the ride!!! Keep up the good work!

[laura]

omg..........please bring izzie back! I cant bear it anymore its so wrong!
alex and lexie....again??!!! come on! thats just not right! he should be with izzie, they just belong together..you cant break up a relationship that took so long to develop! people make mistakes!
pleeeaaase make things right:)

[Britt]

I felt so bad for Mark in this episode. I remember the whole baby thing with Addison and I like how he has matured so much in his life. Who would have thought of all the characters on the show Mark would be the one wanting the family. I wasn't crazy about Mark and Lexie but I actually kind of miss them as a coupling. Alex and Lexie doesn't quite feel right, especially since Alex is still married.

Love the fact that Mer went to thing with Derek. I like seeing them at this stage in their relationship. They went through so much to get to this point. I thought it was hilarious, the whole Mrs. Shephard thing.

Wasn't much Owen, Christina this week but the little there was I liked. I liked the fact that Teddy is being the bigger person. She enjoys teaching Christina and she misses being Owen's friend. Although I still believe Owen has some kind of feelings for her or why would it be so difficult to be around her. I'm just glad Christina has her mentor back.

And Bailey, I'm happy that Bailey may finally see some happiness coming her way. Tucker never seemed to grasp her career and how much a part of her life it is. Hopefully since the new guy is a doctor too this will make for a better relationship for her.

[Carina]

This is a great episode - I think it's one of the best you have. The counterpoint is fantastic, the feeling of urgency with what Derek has to deal with against the wait-and-see atmosphere of the scenes with Meredith and Alex.

The ending is great too! The paradox that is Meredith Grey... Ranting and raving, making sure that Derek's aware of her need to be her own person but at the same time, radiating happiness as reflected on her face. This is why her character is so compelling and relevant to a lot of women nowadays.

[Leez]

After last week's great epsiode, this week felt a real let down.

The good:
1. Arizona playing cupid - although it dragged a couple of scenes too long

2. Mer/Alex/Cris - as though they were watching a tv soap unfold as they're eating chocolates.

The bad:
1. Please stop with all the long monologues. I was ready to tear my hair out every time someone opened their mouth. Let's have some real dialogues. "Pretty, pretty, please"....."No problem, we'll work on it"...."Thank you so much"...see, easy :-)

2. OK, I'm totally on board that Mer/Der have a firm commitment to each other which is as real as a marriage but, really, to call her Mrs Shepherd...."Mrs" is a legal status. Please, enough of shoving this fake marriage down our throats because it makes it seem like they are 5 year olds playing house and that's not what 2 mature adults do in a committed relationship.

3. Teddy/Owen BFF - just feels like a lazy cop out, a way to move on without tying it into the past stories. If they were BFF that told each other everything, then:
- how come she hadn't heard from him in ages
- did not know he broke up with his fiancee
-he tells Cris that she's just a friend from the army
-she didn't know about the 1st time he met Cris, if they tell each other everything, then he would at least have told her about the snow storm (from season 5) when he went back on tour and maybe that he met some one he connected with
- bikini wax....seriously? not something you talk to a straight male bff about, and certainly shouldn't be talking about if you've been telling him how much you love him...borders on desperation.
Teddy is still not redeemed for me....please make her likeable soon because Cris really needs a mentor.

[orangeena2]

Loved the "redefining" theme of your writing with docs and patients - the conflict and scrambling of both Mer/Der in wife and chief roles-beautiful Mer keeps growing, Bailey at loose ends for a man, Mark trying to be a father and grandfather.I like assertive Lexie - like that she may find more of herself without Mark. Grey's has no fear - going boldly forward.
Thank you for investing in the new characters so we will invest too. Same ole same ole is just soap opera - new blood keeps the show strong. April and Dr. Avery had good stuff tonight - glimpses that pulled me in and made me curious. I adore all the originals and their life stories but weaving new folk into their stories is essential. AZ is already a grand slam addition - still working on Teddy but I have faith in where you are taking us.

One last editorial.....

Mark & Callie:great chemistry, BFF - all good

Arizona & Callie: fun, seemingly devoted couple, hot sexy time - all good

Callie: healthy loving relationship strengthens best parts of her character, adds some wisdom and people skills - all good

It seems time to see a bit deeper into Callie's feelings for Arizona or at least another dimension aside from adorableness and steaminess. She's done lots of comforting and BFFing with Mark but floundered with AZ in "Invest in Love." Calzona are cute and hot and happy - we've seen that clearly - hopefully the stage is being set for something more there.

Thanks for sharing your writing thoughts - an excellent addition to this excellent season.

[Hope]

Waxed body parts? That's how you’re trying to demonstrate that Teddy and Owen had a close friendship in the past? They were dealing with life and death issues in a war zone, together, and the example of what good friends they were is that they talked about waxing? I've had lots of really close male friends over the years, and I can't recall a single conversation with any of them about waxing, particularly bikini waxing. I suppose you are trying to redeem Teddy, given the generally negative reaction to her as a character, but I’m not sure you’re being successful. Her whole attempt to re-bond with Owen in the scrub room ("I rented a house where Bambi lives; I wanted a puppy but I got a fish") seemed pretty lame. She comes across like an adolescent, not an experienced, accomplished adult.
The last scene with Cristina, Owen and Teddy was certainly progress and hopefully an indication that we're done with the triangle, or at least with the ambiguous, "will they or won't they" part of it. It is time to end that story line – please!! And if you want the fans to start to like Teddy now that she is, we hope and pray, no longer going to try to interfere with Cristina and Owen’s relationship, please start writing her as an adult instead of a peevish, love-sick teenager.

[Ceren]

Why did you make Alex sleep with Lexie AGAIN?? And this time they weren't drunk. It is GROSS!!

How many times Alex the MARRIED guy sleep with other women? What happened his BIG love for Izzie? I got that he decide to move on. But what about FEELINGS? Did his LOVE vanish into thin air all of a sudden? Sleeping with others dimish his love for Izzie and ruin the couple.

Yes you ruined Alex and Izzie. It is too sad.

I don't know when/if Katie Heigl back. Even if she doesn't come back or only coming back to get her send off, Alex-Izzie fans deserve better. We deserved good final closure at least. NOT this crap! NOT pretend Alex and Izzie, their love, their relation ever happened.

After six seasons, thanks a lot for this crap!!!

[Requithelia A]

I am an AVID fan of Grey's in general. I am really going to be intensely dissappointed if we don't get to have Richard Webber return as Chief. I loved this episode, with one exception. MUST we endure Alex and Lexie in this "can't keep our hands off each other" nonsense. He is still married. And...Lexie is just....well Lexie. Please bring back a healthy and reinvented Chief Webber.

[Blondie]

I loved the way you used the reintroduction of April K to fascilitate the questions for Mer. At the same time, April's avoiding surgery drove her to meddle in Mer's life, brought up things for Mer she was questioning for herself: Will I find myself lost and stuck in a marriage? I was glad she learned something about reinventing things and, not only that, she learned something that will ultimately allow her to have a life that is different from the Chief's. I saw Emile to be a metaphor for the Chief so I was happy to see that Mer and Der will find a way to balance life outside of SG. Loved the way you worked in what Derek learned after he went to woods himself. I loved how he helped April and saw the potential in her. Great job!

[Natalie]

I loved the episode, and your blog, very funny with the buzz-cut story! I loved Arizona in the scrubroom, leaving all those oh-so unsubtle hints (and I love that Bailey is getting some of the Grey's romance), I loved Mer and Der (but then again I always love Mer and Der) that "Yes, dear" part at the end was hilarious. Lexie loked really good this episode, not just her new hair, her make-up was just really pretty, give your make-up artists a pat on the back. I miss Izzie though, please tell me that sad scene with her and Alex isn't the last one she'll be in? I know everyone moans about Teddy, but I always liked her, I just think she's unlucky. I have a lot of respect for her after this episode, after she said she would take it back just to have her best friend back. I love the romances in Grey's, but I love the friendships too, especially Mark and Callie's. Anyway, great episode, keep up the good work!!! I'm VERY excited for next week's episode, from what you've said!

[Jess]

I wish I could sit here and say "Wow! Awesome! Fantastic!" Just as much as I wish that the writers would listen to the fans. But it appears that they don't.

Callie and Arizona to start with. What the hell? You tease for weeks that these two are going to do Valentines right. Uh huh... Just not with each other. They had a tiny scene at the beginning, with Bailey. Then off to do separate things. Arizona spending all day with Bailey trying to sort out her love life. While Callie is offering to raise a baby with Mark. What the hell are you trying to do to this couple? Do you not read all of the posts from people begging to see them as a couple? Do you not get that they are very popular? Apparently not as in terms of romance, last nights episode was pathetic. Callie didn't even mention Arizona when offering to raise that baby. It was lame. No romance, just a giggly "We got necklaces" kids in school do that. "Best Friends" Either show them as a couple or stop teasing the fans that they are. Because it is getting beyond a joke now.

Derek is the most unlucky guy in the world right now. His "Wife" is insensitive, and he is not getting the right support from her.

Lexie and Alex is annoying as hell. I would be happier with her and Avery.

There were parts that I liked. But honestly. When an episode is hailed as a Valentines episode, I would hope it focuses on the relationships of the characters. And it really didn't.

[LMSO]

So I've been thinking about the episode and, in particular, about Owen telling Teddy that he feels like he's cheating on Cristina when Teddy talks to him like that. I know a lot of people were upset with him for saying that, but I really love it because it's not about Owen having romantic feelings for Teddy. He doesn't. But he knows that Teddy has those feelings for him and it's put a wrench in their whole friendship. Apparently they were Best Friends...the kind that could say anything to each other, told each other everything, etc. But now, not only is it weird between them because of her unrelenting declarations of love but, more importantly, because Owen is in love with Cristina now. Really, truly in love with Cristina and all of the intimacy that comes with it. So it really does feel like emotional cheating to Owen when Teddy talks with him that way because that degree of intimacy *only* belongs to Cristina now. Not that you can't have friends besides your partner. You should. You need to IMO. But the deep, true intimacy that you have with your spouse/love/partner ...
whatever... should *only* be between the two of you ... and Owen knows that and respects that. He knows, rightly, that Teddy is crossing a line and he's not having it. And I love how he's choosing Cristina yet AGAIN in that moment, because he's basically telling Teddy that if she's going to be that way, there is nothing left of their relationship. What he has with Cristina is too important. He will not put it in jeopardy. How I love him. And his expression at the end is very much one of sadness because as much as Teddy wants to "unring the bell" Owen knows that their friendship will probably never be the same again. And he understandably mourns that loss, but Cristina...as ever...comes first to him. Owen is all about Cristina. As an aside, in the real world there's no way I would accept my husband having a friendship of that nature with another woman so I'm interested to see how this will continue to develop. Can Owen and Teddy salvage their friendship on some level? Can Teddy put her feelings for Owen aside and be a good teacher to Cristina? Frankly, as long as Teddy stays the hell away from Owen romantically, I'm good. Owen and Cristina forever!

[Riz]

OMG I WANT MORE OF AVERY! <3 Please please please make him a mainstayyyy!!!

[Keisha]

Where was my girl Cristina at? Anyway, sorry didn't like the episode at all. The whole thing just didn't move me. Lexie needs to go back to being a brunette and Mark and Callie need to be together as a couple. Enough playin around. Teddy still needs to go pack her bags and go back to Iraq...maybe she can learn the art of being professional in the workplace. The triangle needed to stop and be over with a couple of months ago. I'm still thinking that Owen has residual feelings for Teddy. If that's the case, then please get those two together asap and they can both go back to Iraq. Cristina can start looking at Jackson. Not liking Alex/Lexie. Izzie's the only woman for him. Thanks.

[Latisha J]

Where was Sandra Oh??? She was barley on my screen which i hated. I saw more of Teddy Monster than her, who i hate! What is her problem? CAN WE PLEASE GET TEDDY A PSYCH CONSULT???? I honestly don't know how Cristina just stood there at the end why she said "I know I said I love you" I whould have been rolling up my sleves and told her to step outside. No one can try and steal my man. But Cristina needs her pretty hands for surgery, i get it. Plus she's a bigger person than me thats for sure. Anyway I love Crowen...or is it Owntina?? Whatever I just love Hunt and Yang and hatteeee that Teddy chick. She needs to dipset off my Tv.

[ella]

Fun episode. Nothing like a little anti-romance for Valentine's Day.

Abbsolutely love Mer and Alex together. Their scenes are always awesome. I think they have the most interesting friendship on Grey's.

Glad Mark and Lexi have broken up. Hope it stays that way. Mark has so much more chemistry with Callie, anyway. Such a waste to put them with other people.

Teddy and the Mercy Westers need to go, though. Why do I know more about that MW guy now then I do about Alex after all these seasons? And what's the point of dragging April back? Total waste of screen time.

Overall, a very entertaining episode, and next week looks great. Can't wait for my next Grey's fix. Thanks.

[CQ]

Not the most interesting episode, a little boring IMO. Liked the car-scene and Alex & Lexie (come on people, they are just having some fun) though.

And I absolutely LOVED Callie... who wouldn't want a friend like her?! My heart broke for Mark, but I'm glad Sloan and her baby are gone - just can't see Mark as a (grand)dad.

Liked the Teddy, Owen and Cristina scene as well, especially when Christina leaves and Teddy and Owen admit that - of course - you can't take things back. But "she will try as hell"... and that's the spirit!