Sonay Washington on "Sweet Surrender"...

Original Airdate: 4-23-09

I won’t take up your time by telling you my name and that this episode of television is my first. I won’t tell you things about myself because I can hear you screaming “I DON’T CARE WHAT KIND OF TEA YOU LIKE TO DRINK, I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT MER AND DER!!!”  Because I understand what you want is a discussion of the episode.  So, I won’t tell you a thing about me.  Not until the end of this blog.  So here we go.   Discussing the episode…now.

Okay, too much is going on in this episode.  TOO MUCH I SAY!  People are throwing themselves out of windows, planning weddings, eating food by the barrels… And friendships are mended, a child dies and a daughter disowns her father. Okay, there’s a lot to discuss here, so let’s go.

Izzie is dying.  That really hit home for me after seeing her collapse.  I remember discussing this story in the writers’ room and Shonda saying “Izzie collapses.  This is the turning point.  She gets really, really sick.”  And I said “WHAT????? Izzie collapses?  MY Izzie collapses???  This is bull*!@# Shonda!”  Yeah, I said that.  It was all in my head, but I said it.  Seriously, it’s heartbreaking to see Izzie this way.  When Izzie fake codes and makes Meredith try on ugly wedding dresses, we get the sense that Izzie’s going to be okay - that the chemo won’t affect her.  And Izzie believes that too.  She fights to maintain who she is throughout the day until her body betrays her.   When Izzie vomits, this disease becomes real to her.  But what we also see is the beginning of a true friendship between Cristina and Izzie.  It took a lot for Izzie to admit that she’s sick to Cristina.  That the cancer is winning.  And Cristina is there for her.  She’s there to wipe her brow and to help Mer with her stupid wedding dresses.  And it’s for Izzie.  Cristina is there for Izzie.  And if anything comes out of this tragedy, it’s their friendship. 

And then there’s Cristina, who is hurting over Owen. Here is a guy she can’t have.  You see, Cristina never thought she would find love again after Burke.  And I’m not comparing Burke and Owen because they are very different, but love is love and Cristina feels it deeply for Owen.  And she can’t have him.  Can you imagine that?  To love someone and they love you but you can’t be together.  To see him everyday – every single day, and not be able to touch him, hold him, kiss him.  Well, this is the hell that is Cristina’s life right now.  She longs for Owen.  She wants him.  But she can’t have him. Because it’s dangerous to love him.  Loving him can get her hurt again. So Cristina stays away and watches him from afar.  Does she have hope for them?  That they will be together again one day?  I don’t know.  But I think we should hope for her. 

And Owen is trying.  He is struggling to heal himself.  He’s done with denial. Let’s face it, nothing hits home like choking your girlfriend in the middle of the night. Which is why Owen’s in therapy.  And I admire Owen for seeking help right away.  It’s brave.  Brave because he has to relive things that nearly killed him.  And yet he’s given himself over to Dr. Wyatt, hoping she can help.  And when Owen defines that feeling at the end, our hearts break because he is so tortured, but we also feel victorious.  Because there’s a chance Owen can mend.  And with that possibility comes hope.  There’s that word again…

And George.  When I think of hope, I think of him.  I wanted George to find himself – his strength as a doctor.  And he has.  Who would have thought that George “007” O’Malley would be a kick ass trauma surgeon?  Seeing George in action took me back to the elevator.  You remember the elevator right?  Intern year.  George and Alex are stuck in the elevator with a patient and the patient needs emergency medical.  George excels and Alex…well, Alex kind of chokes.  So yeah, it’s the elevator moment again and George saves a life.  Again.  I love that this happened again years later. In the bar, when Alex acknowledges that George is great at trauma, it shows that Alex has grown, just like Meredith. Alex would have never admitted George was better at something years ago.  Alex would also never admit to feeling fearful, especially to George.  And Alex is absolutely terrified because Izzie’s sick.  And he’s scared that she’s going to die.  And he’s scared of what that might do to him. And we see yet again, the beginning of a friendship. One between George and Alex. 

Speaking of fear.  Bailey is full of it because she has to tell her husband about PEDS.  Let’s not forget, Bailey’s marriage almost ended because of her job.  And now she wants to take on a new specialty?  PEDS will require all of her time and energy.  How can she tell her husband and expect him to understand?   And why is she doing this in the first place when she’s in the company of dying children all the time???  Well because she loves it.  And because the children…well, sometimes you save one. And that victory is worth it.  Worth the time and the energy and the risk of possibly losing something that’s very important to you, like your husband. But today, Bailey wonders why she’s doing it.  This sweet child that she held all day long, died.  And there was never a chance of saving her.  How does one become accustomed to such tragic loss? 

And loss.  Callie cuts off her father.  How brave is she?  Callie constantly surprises me. She never planned to introduce Arizona to her dad.  Not today.  But, she’s proud of Arizona.  Proud of her relationship and if her father supports her - like he’s always done - then he will accept her relationship, right? Wrong.  My heart goes out to Callie.  But my heart also goes out to Mr. Torres.  He loves his daughter more than anything in the world and he believes that taking her home will help Callie.  He wants to protect his daughter.  He wants to be there for her.  He wants her close.  So no one wins here.  Both Callie and her dad hurt. And we don’t know what this loss will do to Callie.  She has a strong family unit and who knows what life will be like as Callie leaps into life without her parachute.

Let’s end this discussion with some happiness. How proud are we to see Meredith all grown up?  I mean, she is.  Meredith is so sure that she wants to marry Derek Shepherd that it doesn’t even come up for discussion with Cristina.  Meredith is sure.  The only thing Meredith isn’t sure about is this wedding that Izzie is planning.  I mean, Izzie is going all wedding-planning-zilla on Meredith, except rather than go crazy, Izzie is using her illness to get everything she wants.  And Meredith wants to make Izzie happy.  No, this wedding isn’t what Meredith wanted – buffalo wings, hair in a pony tail, reception at “Joe’s” is what she wanted.  But Meredith has grown up, people, and growing means giving your dying friend whatever she wants.  And it doesn’t stop there.  Meredith is finally the big sister that Lexie wants and needs.  I LOVE when Meredith and Lexie approach the guys in the scrub room.  To see Meredith take up for her little sister makes us proud of Meredith.  And the last moment with Meredith and Lexie is wonderful.  Yes, we are happy that Derek and Mark mend their friendship but we are happier that Meredith is accepting her family.  That she’s letting people in.  That she’s growing. 

Hello.  I’m Sonay and this episode of television is my first.  I want to thank Shonda, Krista and Hammer as well as all the writers of “Grey’s Anatomy” for this opportunity and for being such an amazing support system. Tony, it was an honor. Also, thanks to all the assistants and the crew of “Grey’s Anatomy” for making this experience so memorable.

And I don’t drink tea.  I drink scotch. 

Comments

[Bella]

Thank you for giving me back the Grey's I so enjoy!

This was a wonderful episode!

[PamelaJaye]

a few weeks ago, I lost my comments. they never showed up. just vanished. so I gave up on commenting here. checkout sepinwall.blogspot.com for some of my recent thoughts - in the comments section

tonight's I will repost here. (and then I'll read the blog. I like to be unsullied)

I could watch Ellen Pompeo play Meredith Grey trying on wedding dresses for a good long time and be happy about it.

I also deeply appreciated the final scene with Mer and Lexie in the kitchen. It made me feel warm and fuzzY, considering Mer's original feelings toward Lexie. [I'd have those too, if I had a half sister. My father was present, physically, but most times when he was, I'd rather he wasn't. So I have Mer's daddy issues but not her Mommy issues.]

Also, I really liked getting to see George do a good job, and see Alex not hating him at the end. Alex has always had it in for George for reasons I've never totally understood (is it insecurity?) Whenever Alex is feeling crappy, he rips George a new one. So, in the end, it was nice.

I've only watched it once, so I know there was something deep that I missed (I could hear the analogy seeping out of someone's speech, but wasn't paying enough attention to catch the point. hopefully I'll solve that in a few minutes. I had to have dinner (the roomie cooks!) and watch Scrubs)

I watched it again. I guess it was Hector Elizondo's speech, and the Chief looking at Mer.

Really, though - Lexie and Meredith. (and that thing where Mer didn't want the chief in her wedding, I could appreciate that)

Seeing Dr Whatsername again was good too.

Not as awesome as recent eps - it felt sort of "interim" - but...

I also like to watch Mer & Der just sit in bed and talk (they can snuggle while they do - that's fine with me)

also, noticed another new flyover of "Mer's" house

Looking forward to a Krista ep next week!

Snuggles (my duck) wants attention, so I must check on her. (plus I want to read blog)

[S.Cali]

Yay for Mark and Derek making up!! I hate it when those two fight.

See how great an episode can be when George is actually in it?? The fans love him, please don't write him off!

And Callie ranting in Spanish was my favorite part of this episode.

[Bella]

Welcome, Sonay. I first commented before I read your post because it was just so good to have Grey's back on track.

Great episode, and it even featured ALL my favorites (can you tell I love them all?!).

The focus on friendships was the perfect way to get things rolling again.

It's hard to believe this was your first episode...ever. You're talented. Welcome to a great team! Once again, Shonda knows how to pick her writing team.

[K]

Grey's was awesome. I liked seeing more George, just wish his success wasn't once again at the expense of Alex. Although good use of history there.

I love the Mcfamily scenes. MerDer and Mark&Lexie are my two favorite couples. I liked seeing Derek and Mark have it out. Mark rocked it in the OR professionally and personally. I love Grey sisters. Ellen P and Chyler L have great sisterly chemistry and both were so beautiful in this episode.

Callie and Arizon are good together. I hope her dad comes around.

[Melissa]

Great episode, Sonay! Congrats! There were so many great things in this episode, but my favorite parts were Meredith and the dresses. Ellen Pompeo is so adorable, and pulled off those scenes so well.

So excited for the next episode! And thanks for the great MerDer we got tonight!

[Claire]

2 minutes of Callie and Mark make me know why I don't like Lexie and Mark. One has real chemistry? The other we keep having to endure? Not so much. Outside of that it was an outstanding episode. Really amazing and touching. Laughed at Iz and Meredith. Laughed along with Mark/Der and Der/Mer scenes. Loved Alex and George meeting towards the end. less Mark/Liexie and you got it made GA!

[When?]

When is there going to be a scene of just Alex and Izzie? Feels like such a long wait - through the horror of hallucination Denny, Izzie being diagnosed and now Izzie hospitalized. The very little moments they have had have been wonderful and thank you for them. But please give us a nice long scene with Izzie and Alex.

The episode was very good overall. The actress that played the little girl was just beautiful!

Thank you.

[Laura]

This was a good episode, but there are some of us who are really tired of the writers NEVER giving Callie any happiness. After three seasons of abuse from you people, couldn't you maybe give her a litte? It's heartbreaking, and you're so lucky to have an actress like Sara Ramirez who's so good at the drama, but just for once let the poor girl have something without taking it away or diminishing it.

[Lisa]

Thank you for this great episode!!!!

My favorite scenes were of course Meredith and Lexie interacting. MEr has come a long way, being the bride, the big sister, good friend. If only more episodes could focus on her, like it should. It's her show, isn't it?

Yay for Mark and Derek! But haven't they been friends longer than 20 years? In The Midnight Hour MArk said he was a child, when he couldn't sleep and Derek's mom took him right? How old is he now?

I remembered in this episode that I love Izzie. I just hope everything doesn't revolver around her. That's when I don't care about her. And when she sees Denny too.

[Lisa]

OH!
I forgot! How perfect was that scene in the end with the McFamily as a previous poster says! I would love more of the Grey's sister with pretty and prettier. How about double dates?

[Jamie]

I LOVE Meredith and Derek. Can I say thank you for the "together for good" of it all? No longer having to worry so much at the end of each episode. They made me laugh tonight and her frank talk about forgiving Mark was excellent as well. Although it is my sincere wish that at some point Meredith and the Chief make up. I love him as a father figure to Meredith WAY more than I like the deadbeat Thatcher in her life. I wish somehow after five seasons, Meredith and Richard could lean on each other. I am rooting for them!

[ThisIsHeavy]

one of the best ever, and I mean it. I have to agree with Laura though why can't we get a happy Callie. Just because she's a bone doctor doesn't mean she has to be broken all the time. Oh, but back to the main poit, which is that this was a brilliant first effort. I cried watching Grey's which hasn't happened since season 3.

[Brenda]

Great episode! Loved Mark Sloan and Lexie Grey, I really hope to see more of them, please. I can't have enough of the Mark/Derek bromance. Even though the cancer child made me cry&sad, I enjoyed Bailey, the beautiful girl and dad great performance.

[sapient]

Another freakin episode that made me cry! What is with you people at Grey's?
I loved it. Love love loved it. I loved that izzy was faking crap the whole time, I love the dress-up, I love the little Huzbro fight that Marc and Derek had and how they made up all nicey-nicey. THIS is what Grey's is all about. Great job, and I hope they keep you around for many many more episodes.

[nathalia]

Welcome!

can I say I laughed SO HARD when you said ". I won’t tell you things about myself because I can hear you screaming “I DON’T CARE WHAT KIND OF TEA YOU LIKE TO DRINK, I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT MER AND DER!!!” LMAO because I could picture myself telling you that! LOL

I liked the episode, I think you made a great start.

[Anna]

looooved merder & mere/lexie

[Please No]

Please no cheesy double dates with the sisters and the "brothers". It would be like an afterschool special.

[PamelaJaye]

>Meredith is finally the big sister that Lexie wants and needs.

I love this.
Thank you.
East Coast out.

[Laura]

Good episode, but I'm still waiting on a conversation between Alex and Izzie.

[dlferriola]

Thank for a wonderfully written episode. I could not stop crying with the scenes of Bailey and that adorable little girl. Laughed with Izzie and Mer and the wedding gowns. Everyone rocked tonight, George, Callie, Owen,Cris, Sloan, Der were in top form. Izzy's storyline is heartbreaking and well acted. The Greys sisters were so sweet in the end.Thank you once again for a fabulous episode.

[Alwin]

Wow, I thought it was damn good, even before I knew it was your first episode!

[Kim]

love this blog entry! you should do more minus the stuff on you though ...

[mamaloa]

Well, I have to say I do love the interaction with Meredith and Lexie. I think that is well needed. I love that Derek and Mark had mend their ways, but I really wish they would get different partners for girlfriends. The child dying was heart wrenching. I cried my eyes out over that scene. Bailey was fantastic in that scene, and finally George gets more screen time. I loved the elevator scene in Season II, and I love that George has conquered again. I also loved that Alex finally acknowledges this. I hope Izzy will beat this bad in her, and for goodness sake, make Callie and Mark get together. Oh, great to have Derek mention Addison. Great job!!!!

[manda]

For all that you had to give attention to in this episode, you did a great job! Although the airtime for each story probably wasn't much, and the episode had to jump from one to the next, no story or character felt flat or left alone. Major props for that!

And I loved Lexie pigging out all day but I loved more Meredith and Lexie connecting at the end. I liked how Meredith got over her grudge of her family being ruined by finally accepting Lexie, a result of her parents' divorce. And she called Lexie her actual "sister", not half-sister! That made me the most happy.

Great idea to incorporate Sara Ramirez rambling on in Spanish into the episode! True I didn't understand a single word besides "home", but it was definitely a good way to let Callie vent. And whatever she said, Spanish sounds really cool.

And yay for George! Interesting parallel with the heart guy in the elevator episode with Alex, I actually didn't remember that right away.

All in all, great, story-packed episode to come back to Grey's Anatomy for, after a month-long hiatus.