Tony Phelan and Joan Rater on "Before and After"...

Originally aired: 2-12-09

Hi there Blog readers.  This is Joan and I hope you liked tonight’s episode.  Tony and I really liked writing this one – we loved the scary worms in the brain surgery that our amazing medical researchers Moira and Elizabeth came up with; we liked the idea of Owen’s ex-fiance showing up, imagining who she was, picturing the moment she first saw him again.  And we always like singing, cause we’re really big musical theatre nerds so the idea of Derek writing a song for Addison way back when cracked us up and then the fact that Taye Diggs and Audra McDonald, both Broadway singers, would actually perform said song … well … come on!!  But I’m rambling, which I do when I’m excited and I have a lot to say, so let me calm down and try to be organized here.  Actually, screw it, I’m just going to ramble because it’s late where I am (11:07 – I just watched American Idol and think it’s gonna be a great season although I DO NOT understand how they cut Danny’s friend Jamal, but, oh now I’m rambling and it isn’t even on topic … )

Here’s how the episode came to be.  Life was simple.  Tony and I were scheduled to write it.  We were excited.  We had some ideas.  Some fine ideas.  Like I said, life was simple.  And then Shonda came in the writers’ room one day all excited and talking a mile a minute about an awesome idea she just had.  And when Shonda is all excited with ideas pouring out of her it’s infectious and you find yourself getting all excited and agreeing with her that yes, it would be really cool to have Addison’s brother, Archer get some really bad brain condition that Derek has to fix so he has to come to Seattle Grace. And of course Addison would come and her friend Naomi would have to come and then Sam, Naomi’s ex-husband and one of Derek’s old friends would show up and be like, “I don’t know why I’m here, but I’m here” and how cool would it be to have Derek’s whole past come into the hospital right at the point where he’s ready to move into the future with Meredith and oh, how about a scene where they meet Meredith and it’s all awkward and it’s gonna be awesome and before you know it Shonda has left the room to tell casting and production about the super cool cross over episode we’re doing with Private Practice and we were left in the writer’s room going, WAIT, we’re writing a cross over episode???

I’ll admit, I panicked a little.  Because we had this cool opportunity that you don’t get too often for two shows to kind of meet, and have an impact on one another and I wanted to do it justice.  And I thought that the thing we really can do with this cross over is show another side of Derek, I just wasn’t sure what that side was.  So we started to talk about it.  We always imagined that Derek and Addison met in med school in gross anatomy class and basically fell in love over a cadaver.  I know, romantic, right?  But for them I’m sure it was.  And we decided that Derek and Addison were probably the first of any of their friends to get married and it was probably an amazing wedding and then someone in the room told a story about this wedding they went to once where the guy sang a song he had written for his wife about how they met and fell in love.  Now, ten years later, whenever anyone who was at that wedding sees this couple, they demand that the song be sung.  Hearing this story I suddenly knew that Derek had to be that guy.  Because I love that guy.  And because it tells you so much about this group of friends, who all remember the song.  They all thought Derek and Addison would be together forever and now here they are, ten years later, divorced.  And Naomi is divorced.  And Archer is maybe going to die.  And so they need the song, they want the song, they want to go back ten years, when it was all so hopeful and happy and no one was dying. 

Now here’s the thing – they don’t really want to go back.  Derek and Addison don’t want to go back to being together, that’s not the point.  The point is …. It’s like when you look at a picture of yourself from ten years ago and you can’t believe how much you’ve changed.   And you don’t really want to go back there, because you like your life and everything and you certainly don’t want the bad haircut back or the ugly bridesmaid’s dress, but you look at yourself and your old friends in the picture and you realize you haven’t spoken to that friend in years, that person you used to speak to every day, EVERY DAY, and you suddenly, desperately miss that person and have no idea how you got to the point where you don’t even know where they live.  THAT is the feeling we wanted this episode to have.  So we needed a song that would help give us that feeling. 

A word about the song – Krista Vernoff wrote it.  In like 20 minutes.  I had written a bunch of lyrics about Derek and Addison meeting over the cadaver but it didn’t have music and it didn’t evoke that FEELING of bittersweet nostalgia that I knew it should, so I called Krista and asked her to give it a try because she’s actually a songwriter and she called about 20 minutes later and sang me the song over the phone and I cried. And then the day we shot the scene I cried watching it because the actors were so great and it had been such an amazing week, having Kate Walsh back.   And while at first it was weird seeing Addison with Naomi and Sam because it was like, Wait a minute here. You’ve moved on and made new friends? What about us?  What about the fun we used to have?  But then when I saw the chemistry that the Private Practice people have together I was able to get over myself a little and be like, okay, fine, you can have your new big hit show and your new fabulous friends, I’ll be happy for you, I guess. 

Anyway, we don’t often talk about how we come up with the stuff for our episodes … so here’s a couple more things.  You know the scene where Addison tells Derek she’s had to make him small and put him in a tiny box just to get through the day?  The idea for that scene came from Shonda and it came before we even knew what the episode was about.  All we knew was that Derek was going to operate on Archer.  We also knew we wanted a moment before Derek went into the OR where he was having a moment of doubt.  So the tiny box scene came out of that discussion. 

What else?  Izzie and the Intern Bowl.  At the beginning of each season we do tons and tons of research.  We research medical stories, but we also spend a lot of time talking to doctors and residents about their training.  How they learn to cut and sew and suture and diagnose and all the other non surgical stuff they have to do. Anyway, in our research we heard about a residency program that had what they called a Surgical Olympics, with events and prizes and we knew it would be a perfect story for us.  And it felt like this was the right place to put it, that it would be Izzie’s idea because she’s been so involved with the interns and she’s at a place where she needs to believe in them.  Because in the last episode she had them run all sorts of tests on her and they came out normal and Izzie really wants to believe she’s fine (even though deep down she knows she’s not, did you see her hands shaking?) so the Intern Bowl is Izzie’s way of proving to herself that the interns don’t suck, that she’s fine, that Denny was wrong.  And instead of proving that, the Intern Bowl showed that Sadie is a fraud.  She cheated and bribed her way through school and basically showed up at Seattle Grace thinking her old friend Meredith would help her get through residency.  But she didn’t take into account the fact that Meredith has changed.  She’s happy and in love and good at being a surgeon.  She’s not the same girl who drank and slept her way through Europe.  It’s a bittersweet moment when Sadie and Meredith stand together at the end, both aware how much they’ve changed.

Which brings me to Owen and Cristina.  Owen clearly has a lot of damage.  He’s seen a lot and been changed by all the trauma he’s lived through.  He is not the same man he was before.  And Beth (his ex fiancée) wants to believe he can be that man.  She wants to believe that if he comes home they can go back to the way they were.  As for Cristina, even though she believes that Owen is dark and damaged, she’s not looking away.  And the fact that she sees him, really sees him, is like a lifeline to him. 

We have spoken to several war veterans about what it’s like to come back. It’s really important to us that we get this right, that we don’t shy away from the difficulty people have who come back from war.  And part of that difficulty is that people who knew them still think of them as the person they were before they left even though fundamentally they may have changed.  And this episode is where Owen’s past comes back to smack him in the face and really make him see how much he’s changed.

Oh, one more thing – Meredith and Derek.  One thing I sort of love about this episode is that although Addison is back in the hospital, Meredith is fine.  She and Derek are solid and it’s not that weird for her to see Addison.  It’s weird for all of Addison’s friends, but I think it shows what a good solid place the Mer/Der relationship is in that she’s not freaking out about Addison, she’s having more of a reaction to seeing Derek with his past.  He had a whole life before her.  I liked exploring the idea that you never really know a person.  On the one hand, that can be scary and make you feel left out, but on the other, it makes life interesting … there’s always more to someone than meets the eye.  And on that note … I think I’ll stop my rambling and go to bed.  After writing this, I’m kind of in the mood to look at old pictures but that usually ends up in me calling old friends.  Old friends who may not appreciate the call because they’re probably sleeping.  On the other hand, they are old friends so they’re more likely to forgive me. 

Comments

[Bren]

There was more MerDer in this blog than on the show. Can you PLEASE have this be the end of the crossovers. No MORE!

[Toxic]

I LOVED this episode. It was great having Addison and Derek on screen together again, and I loved all the bits from their pasts :) PD and KW did a wonderful job playing off each other as always.

[Jessica]

Mer-Der? What Mer-Der? Who is this Mer-Der you speak of. Talking about Mer-Der does not mean we saw or they have a story. How about for once SHOW us Mer-Der. Cris and Hunt get to talk why doesn't Mer-Der get to utter 2 words to each other privatly all episode long?

[Jackie]

This is the first comment I've ever written. EVER. But I read the blogs every time. I LOVE the way that we get a chance to get into the writer's head. It's like sprinkles on an ice cream sunday. Even though you REALLY look forward to the ice cream, you can't eat it without the sprinkles. You just can't. And now I think, "What did I do after watching an episode before there were writer's blogs?" Loved the episode. But OH MAN am I nervous for next week!

[Magda]

Please don't kill Izzie off the show. I want Alex and Izzie together for real! The show needs her and I love her romantic relationship with Alex.
Ps. Keep George too!

[Alissa]

Okay, I understand Sadie being a fraud, but I think you kind of turned her into a complete idiot which she wasn't before. She was crazy and irresponsible yes, but she had at least some basic medical knowledge. Even I could have gotten close on the whipple draping and I work retail. Quit speeding through booting people off the show. You dragged the Denny/Izzie thing out long enough and you still aren't done with Izzie. It just feels so unbalanced. I still love the show and I will always stick with it, just try to find your balance again please.

[Sarah]

I loved the crossover but then again I'm a huge fan of both shows so that makes sense. I loved the singing and dancing mixed with old friends and surgical tales. Throw in some intern olympics and I'm sold. Great episodes tonight!

[Jake Lipson]

This was really good, and another step back up for Grey's after an awful middle section to the season. Of course, it helps that I like Private Practice too...but the old friends/new friends theme really resonated. Seeing Derek and Addison together as friends respecting each other personally and professionally is a great thing. Thanks.

[Abbie]

I am a follower of both shows so seeing them come together is always kinda fun the cross over thing has played out for now I hope. I want to know what is going on with George, after he passed the intern exam he kinda disappeared, so can we find out what is going on with him PLEASE?

[Matthew Rushing]

Just wanted to say that I still believe in Grey's and it has not let me down. Awesome work, you guys! I just ask that you keep up the good work.

[Rach]

Absolutely adored the episode and the nostalgic feeling it had. It was great to just see how these characters interacted from two separate worlds and hear their stories and see how at one point, they were all so close. I love having so many scenes between Addison and Derek and acknowledging their past.

And the song, it was just so great and cute and well, everything I thought about their past was confirmed. The cute little medical nerds meeting in anatomy and falling in love. And aww, Derek would be the guy that came up with a ridiculous song and sing it at the wedding.

And Archer managing to out-manwhore Mark. I'm astounded.

[K]

Not a bad episode. Nice.

Now can we please finally just bring Addison back to Seattle and get rid of that whole Private Practice nonsense?

Also, thank you for finally getting rid of Sadie!

[Ugh!]

I haven't watched this crappy crossover and today I'm so HAPPY! ADDEK SUCKS and you confirmed it.

Please post my comment. Thanks!

[Failed expectations]

Appreciate the length of the blog and some of the insight. However, as a fan of this show since it's premiere, and please accept my apologies for the negativity.

This is the first episode I've felt I could just give up on Grey's. Maybe DVR the rest of the season, because tonight I felt manipulated to the hilt as a means to get the viewers to become involved with Pr P. I don't watch the show, I've tried but it does not have the same chemistry among the cast, and tonight felt was forced to endure 2 hours of no Mer/Der - yes, we get they are in a good place, because you tell us, but how about showing us? We got more screen time tonight between Addie/Derek than we've had in a single episode all with Mer/Der; the chemistry between those two characters is amazing, why are you wasting it away?

There was a lot on the show, but none of it had to be in this crossover episode, it did not need to happen at all. Allow the characters on Grey's to grow and that would be amazing. You have Mer/Der; Owen/Cris; Mark/Lexie; Callie/whomever and oh...Bailey is phenomenal.

Please, don't let Ms. Rhimes talk you into any more glorious stories, such as Denny's recent appearances, it does not work, and let's a it is that great story we keep being told it is, how long is it going to take to reveal itself now? BTW KH/TRK want to go? Let them. But that is digressing.

Tonight's show. Well written, yes. But, felt completely contrived.

[Claire]

How can I sum up these crossover eps? I think like this:

Addison: "Derek, you be god"
"No Addison, you be God"
Derek: "Addison, you've got an ego"
"No Derek, you've got an ego"

A crossover where we deserved WAY more Grey's than we got sadly. But I'm thankful at least we saw part of Mer/Alex/George/Izzie/Christina. While I'm thankful for the tiny bit I got, I'm sad that for the first hour instead of them, I got Archer and a part of Derek's history long since over that told me very little of Derek worth bringing into the future of his story. Unless I like hot dog stories I guess.

[PamelaJaye]

I have not yet read your blog.
Cause it's Thursday, and you made me watch PP and I had to watch ER and 30 Rock, so i'm only almost thru my second watching.

I loved George tonight, especially in the hall with Mer. He's turned out really well.
I want to know, if you haven't said, above,

Is Sadie just gone now ?(never liked her) and if so, do we never find out how she got here without knowing anything, or who her father is? because the Chief mentioned him just that one time. that would be bad. please put a tail on this tale, okay?

[Maq]

I am glad that you get to Share us your thoughts in writing this story. I honestly LOVED how you wrote it. I may not be a fan of the major plot characters, (Addison and Derek) but after tonight I certainly enjoyed learning their past history, and their anecdotes, it actually made me root for them!(but there's no going back like you said). The best part was, seeing Naomi, Sam, Derek, Mark, Addison all back together, sort of reunion.The make a great ensemble (wink*) It felt like I was watching a mature group of people, spending time together like the good old days. I loved that you guys gave Audra and Taye, 2 great broadway actors, a chance to sing, because I love their voices. And it made me realize how I missed Addison back in Grey's. Kate Walsh made some great performance out of this. I give her credit for that.

On the other hand, I'm loving the Owen and Cristina story. SO is why i watch the show. I LOVED Miranda and Sam btw!

[Sarah in Mpls.]

Joan, I’m not sure how I feel about this episode – but one thing I know for sure is that I agree with you about Jamal on American Idol. I did not see that coming. Are they nuts?!
Anyway, back to the show. I’m sad that we didn’t see more of Mer/Der. I kept hoping that maybe after one of Derek’s and Addison’s confrontations, Mer would show up to support him. I’m not too thrilled that Derek is going to a dark place. He seems so angry and exhausted. It will be a change of pace to see Mer try to help him for once, but I hope he’s not on the dark side very long! And PLEASE don’t make us wait until the end of the season for him to propose to Meredith!
I LOVED Derek’s confrontation with Archer – the “coward” scene was great! I like the characters from “PP” so it was both fun and disturbing to see the group at Joe’s. Derek’s face showed all of the conflict of emotions. It was “The Big Chill” meets “Grey’s Anatomy” – very thought provoking!
What we learned about Owen intrigues me. It’s one thing to not tell your ex-fiancé that you’re back in the country – but your mom? I understand that he doesn’t want to make her sad but is he seriously going to have her believe that he’s in Iraq forever? He’s definitely dark and twisty and I do like how Cristina gets that.
What I don’t understand is why Mark keeps talking about Derek’s personal stuff to everyone. Seriously, what kind of friend is he? I find it quite disturbing – although I loved that Addison learned about the ring and that Derek confessed that his mom hated her-especially since we met her a few weeks ago. Very funny!
I’m glad that we didn’t see much of Callie. And I certainly didn’t expect that Sadie was going to leave under those circumstances! Good one!
Finally, I’ve missed seeing George so much and I’m sorry to see him go. It’s so sad that the original interns are splitting up!

[PamelaJaye]

Okay, it was better with the explanation and I like that you do the research and all of that (even though the department heads still don't have offices)

I really like what you did with George. It's been a long time since he was.. George. But he's like George 2.0 now. I hope he doesn't leave.

Oh right - the repatriated. That was good, that you researched that and tried to get it right. It felt right to me, but I don't know anything.

The song... I miss Krista writing episodes
and of course the story is not over.

I liked hearing about the background and I liked hearing Mer say that she wanted to be where she was, as her theme played (I thought it was her and Derek's theme, but whatever)

As for old friends, Facebook seems just stuffed with them. So if you want to get anything else written - don't get into it... it's worse than the rest of the internet at eating your life! (and it's weird when you look at a picture of your cousin who you haven't seen since she was 8, and realize she is the mother, not the daughter, in the pic you are looking at)

Good ep, but I"m still feeling unfinished.

btw, whoever gave brain parasites to a character named Archer has been watching too much Star Trek: Enterprise.

[PamelaJaye]

and Mer finally got an answer to her questions of episode 1.08 - who are you? who are your friends? I guess things got so hectic from then till now that she forgot she wanted to know.

[PamelaJaye]

one final thought

there was no final thought.
This week on the first Scrubs, JD did his closing voiceover from Elliot's cell phone. It was odd, but it was okay.
I know this isn't over yet either, but an ep without Mer's voiceover at the end? It's just... unfinished. And I'm not finished. (no, wait, that was Ellis. and she was, sadly)

[Diana]

It's funny how there is more Meredith in the blog than the actual episode.

[Tribecafilmfest]

This show is all about ADDISON and DEREK for me. Sad there's no more of them. I'm glad I watched this crossover and learned about their past. It's a shame we'll never get to see these actors together in a scene again.

[MindyM]

I actually forgot that this is the second installment of a three story arc, so I was caught off guard when it ended abruptly with the pregnant woman having more complications. I should have remembered that this is February, SWEEPS time, so of course there has to be a three part story arc. This time we have PP join in the fun. Since I only watched a few early episodes of PP, it was a little hard for me to know what was up with all of them. It doesn't matter, because the only part I care about is what relates to Grey's.

It always seems to get interesting when Addison comes back to Seattle Grace. It's revealing to see from her point of view how all the characters have changed. I guess it was nice to know the history of Addison and Der, not that it's of much interest to me at this point. But it did help to give us more depth to Der by giving us a glimpse into his former life. I loved that Mer was okay with Addison returning. That in itself speaks volumes about how far she has come.

I still have trouble with these artificial plot devices which create crises that require three episodes, always during sweeps. I thought the worms in the brain was really icky and Addison's brother is a bigger jerk than Mark was when he first appeared. But I really don't have any emotional investment in the other PP cast members, so that part was not particularly compelling for me. It was all well acted and somehow these characters from PP managed to integrate nicely with the characters on Grey's. It's too bad that I can't muster the effort to care about them.

I am fascinated by what is happening with Owen. I hope you writers do make sure to get his story right. People should see what soldiers go through and how it changes them forever, even after they come home. It was shocking to realize that Owen can't bring himself to let his own mother know that he is back home. He doesn't want her to see the person he has become. Also, his fiance reappearing was equally shocking and disturbing. The way he dumped her was so cruel. I had no idea how Cristina would handle this turn of events. I was afraid that it would be a deal breaker for her, that she might turn away from Owen. But she didn't and thank God she told him to tell his fiance the truth about her father, that she deserved it. I loved her poise and composure in that moment and also her innate decency. She really has grown so much since Burke. When Owen looked at her intently and told her that she is the only one who sees him, well, that was quite a moment. I was so glad that she held his gaze. God, these two are brilliant together. They never disappoint. This is why I suffer through the mediocre stuff. Just to see this magnificent duo perform their acting magic every week is such a privilege. I hope that Cristina can get Owen to let his mother know that he is home. She deserves at least that, too.

I thought the sudden reveal of Sadie was kind of forced, but she has not been believable from the moment she arrived. I am okay with it if it gets her out of this show. She does not fit in at all. The one scene that stayed with me was when Sadie and Mer confronted each other. That was something to see. Talk about how far Mer has come. I know that feeling so well. When you reunite with an old friend, who was like your alter ego, only to discover that you have moved on and are now in a very different place and don't get her or know her anymore. That was what happened with Mer. She was truly appalled that Sadie would even think that she might compromise her own career to help her old friend try to scam her way through the program. Good for Mer! She is becoming a grownup.

It's painfully obvious that something is terribly wrong with Izzie and equally painful that she is in denial. At least now Alex finally realizes that something is definitely wrong with her. It's about time. Am I to understand that the purpose of dead Denny returning was to let Izzie know that she is dying and will soon be joining him? It still is no excuse for how long it dragged on. One of the all time low points for this show. I will be sorry if Izzie really is dying. I wanted to see Izzie and Alex be together. They finally managed to do it and now it would appear that Izzie is not long for this world. Too bad.

I am glad that Addison made fun of Mark with Lexie, because it truly is such a total joke. I hope Mark comes to his senses. The one thing that stood out to me with Addison coming back, was how different she was from Lexie. Addison is a successful, accomplished surgeon, strong, intelligent, and impressive, flaws and all. She and Lexie are worlds apart.

Next Week it's on to the final installment of this latest incarnation of the three part story arc. I hope it will be worth watching. I see some signs of the old Grey's, but there is still an overcrowded cast and some lame story lines that need to go.

[Larissa]

Wasn't digging the whole musical thing you had going on there. I'm so intrigued with Izzie right now. I want her to discover what's wrong with her. I need to know exactly what's wrong with her, and poor Alex. Oh my god, poor, poor Alex. He even admitted it, he tends to go for crazy women.

I'm sick of MerDer. All this episode did was cement for me that while Derek seems to know Meredith, and Meredith seems to know Derek, they really know nothing about each other. A person's past is very important to who that person is. A person's past made them into the person they are today.

But it was enjoyable to watch, I always enjoy reading the blogs.