Debora Cahn on "Wish You Were Here"...

Original Airdate: 1-8-09

Cristina and Meredith are fighting.  I hate it when they fight.  They’re so damn miserable.  You’d think maybe they’d enjoy it.  Worthy opponents, squaring off.  Throw down of the century.  But no.  Not even Cristina, who usually relishes the opportunity to tear anyone a new one, seems like this is just eating away at her soul.  Where’s the sense of fun?  Of sport?  Can’t they try to get into the spirit of it?  No.  They both look kind of oxygen deprived.  And that’s really what it’s like.  You go through something like surgical residency – it’s a program designed to almost kill you.  Like boot camp, but it goes on for years.  How do you get through it?  For Mer and Cristina, you survive by having a person by your side – minute by minute, trauma by trauma.  Someone who will make you laugh when you have part of a dead person’s lymph node in your hair.  Someone who will tell you your attending’s a brainless chinless douche bag when he’s just spent twenty hours explaining why you’re a moron.  Someone who’s in it with you.  And without that someone – it’s just torture.  The days are grueling.  The work is relentless.  The satisfaction is nonexistent.  It’s miserable.  Without your other half… it’s like breathing without the oxygen.  But Mer’s got Derek, shouldn’t that help?  Not really.  It’s not the same kind of other half.   He’s there for her when it’s all over, but he’s not in it.  He may remember what it was like to be a resident, but probably it’s like women who go through labor.  It sucks just badly enough that something in your brain makes you forget.  It’s hazy for Derek, the days in the trenches.  He’s probably grown a little nostalgic about it.  He can’t remember what it was really like. 

And Owen… wouldn’t it be great if Cristina had Owen to turn to?  Sure, he’d be like Derek – not a replacement for Meredith, but still.  He’d be something.  Wouldn’t we all feel a little better?   So why can’t he get his damn act together?  Why is he so damn hot and cold all the time?  Why?  He’s big and strapping and gorgeous and brilliant and capable and strapping and gorgeous, why is he such a basket case?  Cristina doesn’t trust people.  She just doesn’t come to it naturally.  But here he is, holding out a hand, or at least a cup of coffee.  She decided to let him in… and every time she comes to him in a moment of need, he’s totally checked out.  Don’t you want to just smack him upside the head? 

And while we’re smacking people upside the head… CHIEF RICHARD WEBBER.  WHAT THE @#$%?  I think that’s the real problem, for everyone, on this particular day.  The Chief has checked out.  He’s on strike.  Gone.  It’s like the center of gravity stopped pulling, and everyone’s about to slip off the face of the planet.  Bailey, for a change, is the only one who really notices what’s going on.  But there’s not a whole hell of a lot she can do about it.  He’s known his hospital dropped to #12 for weeks.  But he never really looked at it.  Never really felt what it meant.  It was a number somewhere on a chart.  It sucked, but it didn’t change anything.  Right up until Jordan Kenley dropped dead on a patient’s bed (that poor traumatized child) and the Chief discovered no good pediatric surgeon wanted to come here and take his place.  Devastating.  The Chief’s never experienced anything like that.  He never had to ask, never mind beg, surgeons to come to this hospital.  They were clamoring at the door.  And now… people don’t want to work here?  Add him to the list of people who are trying to walk the halls without oxygen.  Except he had the good sense to lie down, in a dark room, and put a Do Not Disturb sign on the door. 

And Derek.  Saving the life of a serial killer.  When all he can do is look in the guy’s eyes and imagine the face of the man who shot his dad. 

And Mark Sloan… Mark Sloan who could always find happiness, or at least some brief gratification, in an on-call room, with pretty much anyone, but certainly with Callie, Mark Sloan is falling, hard, for the Littlest Grey.  And his conscience, which has always been buried pretty deep, won’t let him have her.  He betrayed Derek once.  It was a biggie.  And he can’t do it again.  Despite the fact that Lexie’s trotting around him like a happy puppy.  He can’t go there.  Won’t.  Talk about lack of oxygen…

People are having a really crappy day. 

Except Izzie.  Who couldn’t really be happier.  So she hangs out with a dead guy, it’s a detail.  She’s got the two loves of her life by her side.  And they’re kind of getting in a pissing contest with each other, where the best way to win is to impress her in the sack.  Or in an exam room.  Really anywhere with a horizontal surface.  So she’s a friggin whack job, she’s having a great time.  And Alex, who thankfully has had enough crazy women in his life that Izzie’s confession about seeing dead people strikes him as pretty close to normal… Alex is cool with it.  That’s the nice thing about being raised by a boozer and a junkie, it takes a lot to flip you out. 

So… to the skeptics… to those who wonder why we let this woman spend her time with a dead guy,  A DEAD MAN, WE SAW HIM DIE, WE’RE REALLY QUITE SURE HE’S NOT THE KIND OF PERSON YOU SPEND TIME WITH… It makes her happy.  And she’s the only one who is.  She wished he were here.  And her wish came true.  That’s supposed to make you happy.  It often doesn’t.  Be careful what you wish for, and all that.  But sometimes it does.  Sometimes it makes you really happy.  So he’s dead.  Why get bogged down in the details?

Comments

[s.cali]

Sloane and Callie are so fantastic together! They are the best things about this show by far.

[agy]

great blog....thanks for posting right at end of show pst.

[Finally]

Thanks for the Meredith and Derek scenes. Finally!

[merderfan]

This was a great episode. Love Meredith, loved MerDer, loved Callie/Mark. Everything was great.

But Cris and Mer need to make up, like, yesterday!

[Shelia]

I really did enjoy this episode, but please move the Denny plot along already. It's going so slow and no one is enjoying, even if you say Izzie is. Let's move on.

[Mary from Washington]

Hi Debora,
Thanks for an amazing episode. I loved the MerDer throughout and the truth about Derek's dad. It was very fresh and a great start to a new year. I'm so glad that someone other than Izzie is aware of Denny's presence. Very excited to see where this goes. Thanks for a great episode. And thank you for creating the words that I love to memorize and repeat in my head. Keep up the good work.
---Mary

[JackieS]

I know all about "be careful what you wish for".....inside and out... this is still bs.

Get your act together and get this stupid azz ghost off this show.

You are ruining every Alex and Izzie scene that some people have been waiting for since season one.

Half this episode was fantastic and the other half was crap.

Oy! and Gah!!

[Shelly]

Thank you Deborah. In a season sadly lacking of any solid Meredith and Derek scenes, you finally have them together. Speaking, not always agreeing, but working through things..TOGETHER. Both fans and critics have noted the stunning lack of time for these two wonderful characters while praising the fact that they are indeed together, talking, growing as a couple this season. I want to thank you for putting them in this episode, and beautifully acted by both. May this 3 part arc lead to further growth for these two characters and more screen time for the actors that play them. Don't let this arc end up dividing them (as that's been done repeatedly in past seasons) Patrick Dempsey and Ellen Pompeo prove time and time again that they simply "have it" Don't ever forget what a gift that is for you and for the fans who love them.

[L S]

Let Denny die, for real this time. I don't care if it makes Izzie happy, Alex can make her happy just fine on his own. Please, please let Denny die for good this time.

Thank you so much for the Meredith and Derek scenes! It was great to see them both being sweet and affectionate and really talking and sharing. It's always great to see them work together, and it was great to get some backstory on Derek. This is what we've been waiting for; please keep it coming!

I'm also loving Cristina/Owen and Mark and Callie's friendship.

[Anne]

I thought this was a very good episode. The medical storylines were dramatic and moving and the relationships between the characters - all of them was interesting and complex. Christina really needs to fix this thing with Mer as she is quite alone and without her person and Mer did apologize. Sadie was nice to talk to Mer about that. Sadie didn't act like a psycho in this ep. Mark and Callie - always fun to watch such chemistry and funny scenes too. Loved Alex in this one and Izzie too - some great moments/scenes and a cake - so touching and sweet from him. George was great too working with the woman who had fractures and a tumor. Loved the line the woman gave about going to Denver when she could.

Derek - well after we found out about his dad I can sure understand his feelings for his patient alot better and it would be difficult for him. I'm surprised he didn't tell the chief in their little talk. Liked that scene. Glad he told Meredith.

And last but certainly not least Meredith & Derek - great interaction on this episode professionally and personally - Yea!!!! :) Loved the beginning and ending!!! These are the moments I cherish seeing as they talk, cuddle, laugh, dance and trying to be there for each other and in a loving fun relationship. To quote the promo for season - here is where you live for the moment. I love the moments with Meredith and Derek as they develop their relationship this season. Nice to see more of them. And if my wish comes true like the line at the end says it might there will be more of these moments:) Can I put a plug in for a birthday episode for Meredith or Derek? Thanks for a great hour of tv tonight

[Kelly]

I have been mesmerized by the slow build of Mark and Lexie since the first episode this season. The chemistry between Eric Dane and Chyler Leigh is electric. Eric Stolz is amazing and down right scary.

[kitty]

I hope cristina tells Meredith to get lost, when she comes cap in hand to be friends again.

[Devika]

Loved the Mark and Lexie stuff. They are one of my favs on the show now.

I also loved the Mark/Callie scenes. Their friendship is one of the best parts of the show. Also the Alex/Izzie scenes, and I didn't mind Denny that much.

Happy to see MerDer, and I thought Meredith's scenes with the death row patient were really good.

[rkuang]

I'm not sure the point of this episode really got across. It's almost too metaphysical and intangible, but I get it. But maybe it's not for a television show to display, but for people to experience. Still, you guys came really close, and that's unprecedented. This show displays my hope, and that's good.

[LylaReese]

Thanks so much for Callie and Sloan. I totally love them. They sort of gave the downer parts a bit of a lift (not that the downer parts weren't fantastic). Tonight's episode was really great, but honestly, I'm still really missing George. I'm hoping maybe he'll figure out the Denny thing and maybe do something.... in any case, happiness is more Callie and Mark in my book. :) (I also noticed Callie didn't meet Arizona yet....)

I LOVE ALEX and IZ.....they take my breath away.

I love Bailey, she is always fantastic....I would definitely pick her if I had a medical emergency. She has just the enough of everything..sympathy, smarts and fight.

Finally can you put Mark and Callie together?

Oh and REALLY kill Denny?

Ohhhh and bring back BURKE?

I know I am dreaming...that is just too much happiness on a Thursday night. LOL.

[madussaa]

Loved the epi, especially merder......plz keep them coming, dont stop....n plz del dead denny, i like izzie with alex n she cant have 2 bfs at one time....Christina n mer.....ummm...i have a feeling they both will get together by the end of this serial killers epis....im just worried about what mer said, Hes not gonna jump n take us by the throat, will he???that will be something... looking fwd to next week.....waiting impatiently.......hahahah why do i have to wait 7 days to see it.....??? why??? :p
Oh mcmom is coming next week n shes gonna keep mer on her toes, poor her, this time mer will be alone...christina wont be by her side saying her..awwwwww......thats so sad......with they 2 will get together soonish....;)

[lilli]

Loved the episode,but, even if I also like Izzie's storyline,I have to say it's kinda copied from "Dona Flor and her two husbands", by Jorge Amado...nice reference though...I love that book!Anyway...it kinda hurted to hear Sadie and Meredith's dialogue...it's exactly what I do with people when I fight with them...cutting them away...thank you for remindin me it's horrible and I should know better than this...

[mamaloa]

No thanks for the Meredith and Derek scenes. I really like Callie and Mark together. They are really fun to watch. I love their scenes. This episode was really intense, with that PDR person. It looks like some more of that next week. Is there a hostage type thing happening next week? I hope Meredith and Christina will be back to normal again. I do like their frienship. I may not like MerDer all that much, but I do like Meredith and Christina's friendship. I think Derek's dancing was a bit goofy, and silly. He's kind of crazy, and cute. (smile) By far this was a better episode this season. Now, about Private Practice. I LOVE IT!!!! I think I might like it a little bit better. I can't wait for the cross over. I hope Derek and the Chief still go. Please stop this Sadie and Callie thing, and put Callie with some nice man. I think Mark should fall in love with Callie. I still love Owen (smile). Alex and Izzy are ok. I love Denny, and I think I'm getting the Denny thing, but I still think it's time he go to heaven.

[L.]

I miss my favorite show. These recent episodes are so bad, I don't know why I still care. I used to like every character, follow every storyline, now I'm ok with 5 minutes on YouTube, cause the rest is just blah.
The fight between Mer and Christina seems so forced. I don't even know what they're fighting about. So Mer didn't take the blame for something she obviously knew nothing about? There's no way her best friend would still hold that against her. I hate how you seem to think only drama and fight seem to make good TV. Can't you be a little bit more creative than that?! Like Merder, no conversation between them for ten (10!!!) episodes, now this death row patient storyline is obviously just created to add some drama between them. Very predictable, very boring. Don't you think your fans deserve a little more than that?
Callie... just there for comic relief? Seriously, how can you destroy her character just like that? She was the most confidant of all the women on the show, didn't care what others thought about her. Now she's just a babbeling idiot. I feel really bad for all these fine actors.
Mark Sloan.. for more than two seasons you made us believe he's the guy who can have every woman. And he goes for Lexie? The most boring girl in the whole hospital? From Addison to Lexie?Seriously!
And don't get me started on the Denny storyline, it's so wrong on about 100 levels. But I guess enough has been said about it. Is it supposed to be funny at times? I don't get it. Im kinda mad at Jeffrey Dean Morgan for agreeing to to this crap. And I feel bad for the Alex/Izzie fans.
One more thing, please no more Sadie.
That's it... sorry for the rant, sorry for the bad english.

[Ashley]

The Denny thing is wierd, just wierd. But other than that, I quite enjoyed this episode. What did he mean when he answered Izzy's question about the gift, "I think I just did." Was it obvious and I missed it, or is something cryptic behind that?

I'm enjoying Alex's new softer side, it's a welcome change.

McSteamy wants more than just sex? Very interesting... especially when it's with Lexie, didn't see that one coming.

It's a good thing McDreamy is hot, because the guy cannot dance -- loved the scene though. Bless him, he tried to dance it out with Meredith!

Please give George a storyline... please?!!! The show won't be the same without him. You keep adding characters instead of focusing on the characters we already have.

[kristi]

LOOOOOOOOOOVED Mark and Lexie! They are so fabulous togther! Best part of the show for me! I love seeing Mark fall for Lexie! They are perfect for eachother. Please bring on more Sexie. They are pure magic together and could be the next MerDer!

I like Mallie as friends but nothing more. Dont ruin the friendship by making it more than platonic. As friends they are great, as lovers noooooo.

I also liked Sadie alot in this episode, she is great with Callie.

Please keep Callie lesbian/bi.

MORE MARK and LEXIE PLEASE!

[Judy]

I never asked for Denny to come back once he died. Yeah, I was really, really sad when Denny died. I think just about everyone was, but did even one person ask, please let the ghost of Denny have ghost sex with Izzie up until when you aired to ghost sex thing? No. I did not see that request anywhere on this messageboard EVER or anywhere on the internet. And I'm ALWAYS on this messageboard and around the internet. So your blog is a bunch of bull. And no it doesn't make me happy. You ruined Denny for me. FOREVER. Thank you so very much.

[Olivia]

I'd just like to say that I am still loving my Grey's Anatomy! I love everything that is going on. I love Slexie, their my fav couple (behind MerDer of course) and can't wait to see where it goes. I love Meredith and Derek and I really hope they can make it work and get past the death row patient (who by the way was rediciously great). Im not liking where the chief is at cause he isn't doing anything to fix SGH and it bugs me. Love Alex but I'd like to see him react more to the whole Izzie/Denny issue. Which I don't completely get at the moment but I have faith that the story will unfold and make more sense really soon. Oh and my favourite scenes in that episode were between Sloan and Callie...great stuff!!! Finally my fav fav stuff right now revolves around Christina the Christin and Meredith fight (oh and snap to Meredith for that hell b*tc*y comment in surgery) and Owen. I love that she has got these great complicated relationships going on!!!
Okay so what I really wanted to say was that I love what is happening with Grey's Anatomy and can't wait to see more!!! :):):):):):):):):):)