Stacy McKee on "Kung Fu Fighting"...

Original Airdate: 11-1-07

So – I have this group of friends. It started as just four of us – two of whom I’ve known since I was six years old… They all live in Texas (where I grew up) and I live in California – so we don’t all get to see each other as often as we’d like… A few years ago, we decided to start taking little trips together – just us girls. Nothing too fancy – just happy, silly girlfriend getaways – to Vegas or New Orleans or Hawaii… And (as a joke, really) we started calling ourselves “The Bad Girls.” Mostly because we’d find ourselves in Vegas on a Friday night, totally wiped after airplane flights and crazy work weeks – and we’d be ready for bed, perfectly sober, by 11pm. SO happy just to sleep.

Very sad. So NOT “bad” at all. In any way. And yet… the name stuck.

Pretty soon, all our other friends, our spouses, our parents – they all started calling us “The Bad Girls” too. Us. The most ridiculously tame “bad girls” on the planet – I’m not kidding. Our version of hardcore is getting henna tattoos – because they’re not permanent.  True story.

The strange thing is, it’s like we’ve inadvertently formed some exclusive club --- our husbands get jealous of our trips and try to invite themselves along. Some of us have been approached by other friends – they want to be Bad Girls too; isn’t there some way they can join in all the fun? They’ll do what it takes. They’ll get hazed. They can be bad; they can be hardcore… It’s a little like our own private Fight Club or something – only, with pedicures and martinis instead of all the blood and – well – punching.

We’re so not hardcore, and yet… we also kind of are. Hardcore comes in many shapes and many sizes. (And, yes, I know that sounds porny. You people and your dirty dirty minds.)

Let’s talk about Meredith. She ended the last episode by finally putting her mother to rest – by washing Ellis’ ashes down a scrub sink. And now – she’s reeling a little bit. Starting to reevaluate why she is where she is, why she’s being haunted by her past, why – after experiencing death and coming back from it – she’s still too scared to really move forward and go after what she really wants – what she really needs…

Meredith wants nothing more than to be strong and brave and… hardcore. And, in this episode, she comes so close. She’s lying there in Derek’s arms, and she starts to open up – to let him in. And, you can see it in Derek’s eyes. You can almost hear what he’s thinking in that moment – that this is it. He put himself out there two episodes ago, he told her that he wants a future – a real future – and he wants it with her… And finally, Meredith is about to answer him. With something other than sex in an on-call room. She’s about to let him in and admit to him that life is short, so fricking short. She wants that same future with him too. And yet…

She doesn’t. She stops short of actually letting Derek in and – as usual – shuts down. Just shy of REALLY putting herself out there. Almost hardcore, but… not quite. He knows it. And she knows it. Which is why she’s so messed up in the end.

Ah… the end. When Meredith opens the door to find Alex and Lexie getting sexy in the hallway. Love it. In fact, I pretty much always love Alex Karev – like when he’s heckling George or stifling laughter as they all watch the skydiver video. Alex is kind of the epitome of hardcore – he’s a bad ass without even trying. He was with Ava last episode, he’s with Lexie in this one… and he makes no apologies for that. He calls it like it is – no one can say Lexie doesn’t know what she’s getting in to – Alex couldn’t have been more clear. She may get laid, but she isn’t getting a boyfriend. Not from him. Which she is Ok with…

… Or, at least, she must think she’s Ok with it. Lexie’s struggling to be hardcore herself. I don’t know if I’d go so far as to say, perhaps, this kind of struggle must run in the family, but… Okay. Fine. It must run in the family – because Lexie, though she’s very different from Meredith in many many ways, in this one way – they seem to be exactly alike.

Meredith and Lexie both want to succeed. They want to be strong. They want to feel normal. They want, so much, to be whole. But it’s a struggle – a genuine struggle for them. Being hardcore doesn’t come naturally. Sometimes, they have to fake it.

Which, in Lexie’s case, means getting sexy with Alex.

But my favorite incarnation of being hardcore in this episode, of course, comes in the form of the gentleman’s evening. Maybe because it reminds me of me and my Bad Girls. Or maybe because it’s so fun to see Derek and Mark try to figure out what the heck a gentleman’s evening actually is. (Monopoly is the perfect choice, by the way, because this is Richard’s gentleman’s evening. Remember – he’s the guy who brought a selection of soft cheeses with him to ‘rough it’ in the woods on the camping trip.) And maybe it’s because it’s just so great to watch Erica Hahn, on her first day of work at Seattle Grace, walk in, infiltrate the evening, and make the guys squirm.

Now SHE is hardcore. Clearly. A welcome addition to Seattle Grace. It’s been a while since a kick ass female surgeon stepped into the mix to shake things up. And the fact that it’s Cristina’s world she’s going to shake up the most? Even better. This is gonna be fun.

My point is – being bad, being hardcore? It’s all subjective. It’s a state of mind. It’s different for every single one of us. It’s an uber competitive game of Monopoly on Derek’s trailer porch. Or, it’s Lexie deciding she’ll take Alex up on his offer of uncomplicated, no-strings-attached sex. Or it’s George curling up next to sweet, frazzled Izzie, and deciding it’s okay if they just…sleep tonight. It’s staying awake for your own open heart surgery. It’s taking pride in your job, even if today that just means holding a bloody wedding dress, allllll day long… It’s giving yourself permission to take that rare day off of work so you can hop on a plane and spend some quality time with your Bad Girls. Even if the most debaucherous thing you and your Bad Girls do all weekend is fall asleep before 11pm and stay in bed the next morning till noon. That’s still TOTALLY hardcore. It’s not lame at all. Uh uh, no way. Sleep gives us strength. And you can’t be hardcore if you’re all tired and cranky with bags under your eyes and --- Ok, fine. Sleeping till noon isn’t exactly hardcore. Whatever. You guys know what I mean.

Comments

[mamaloa]

I would like to know when this new Love interest is going to come for Derek? I'm waiting to see when she gets here. Is she Dr. Hahn? I really wish you would just end Meredith and Derek. Next week the chief walks in on them. How stupid is that? I can't stand Mer/Der. They make me sick, and I don't think I'm the only one that feels that way either. Also, George and Izzy, couldn't get it on. Maybe it's because they are to much like brother and sister. Gross!! It was hilarious though with Dr. Hahn and the pretty boys (LOL). Is she the new love interest? I like Addison still. It would be interesting to see those two kick butt women on the show. Although, I think Addison is a little bit softer than Dr. Hahn. Love Sloan torturing George. Another riot, and Callie telling George she's letting go. That's great, because Callie deserves better. Mark is great with her. They look cute together. I love Mark and Derek. I hope that keeps up, even if Addison does come back to the show. I still love to see Derek and Addison together, or Derek with anyone other than Meredith. I just can't get into Mer/Der, but you writers are going to do what you want. I just wish you wouldn't be so pressured by all these Mer/Der fans. I mean if you break them up, just do it. Don't do all this break up sex stupidity. That's just giving false hope. If they are together, it will be sickening. Like I've said before, I was more interested in Season II because of Derek being with Addison away from Meredith. I guess I'm a minority on that subject, but they really make me sick. I guess I already said that. I really am curious about this love interest. Bring her on, or is she already there? Am I missing something? Here's a thought. Could Meredith be jealous of Lexie with Alex? That would be very interesting. It looked like she was.

[Jessica]

Tonights eppi was great.
Cant wait to see how MerDer works out in the next couple of weeks.

Whats gonna happen with Greys when the writers strike?

[renee]

I enjoyed this episode a lot. I totally loved Izzie crying about being too tired --- and loved that she only shaved one leg. And Dr. Hahn is such a badass, I feel empowered after seeing her tonight. It was pretty wonderful, so thanks!

[Kryss]

I beg to differ...

putting friends before work and putting self before alcohol is absolutely hardcore.

being honest with someone in a new relationship and going to sleep rather than sexing is pretty hardcore.

in the end, being hardcore is doing the thing you need even when it's not what is expected of you or what someone you care about wants.

[Dana]

Wow..how I love Meredith and Derek. I'm sincerely hoping this will be the year their relationship FINALLY takes hold and stays great as there is so much potential in a long term relationship! Thanks Stacy!

[Denise]

Mark so rocks this season. Hope he gets a love interest...

I like that Derek and Mark are becoming friends again too.

[paula]

I don't think you even know how wonderful Ellen Pompeo has been in the last two episodes. I can see her trying and I KNOW that she wants Derek and my heart is breaking for her. I SO want her to have that saftey and love from Derek and I am soo hooked to see if she gets there for happiness and gets Derek too. Wonderful episode. Loved Callie and George in this one:)

[Thomas R]

Pretty good ep. I guess I might stick with the show. (I was going to switch to "The Office" at one point)

I still have lingering hostility to her, but it's nice to see Izzie displaying the qualities that made me like her once upon a time. The way she calmed down birdman was sweet and showed she was more right for this surgery than Cristina. (Although I still felt bad for Cristina anyway) I'm not sure I really bought the idea behind him being universally allergic to all anaesthetic, but I was willing to overlook it. Weirdly he reminded me a bit of Denny at one point, even though there's no real similarity.

On a related front I think Gloria Swanson said of Rose Kennedy that she was either a "saint or a total fool." Related because I think Callie is similar to that. She is ready to let go of her disastrous marriage and even talk to George in a civil way. This despite the fact I didn't see a divorce or annulment be finalized. This letting go either shows a remarkable maturity and understanding of the situation or it shows a remarkable lack of self-awareness and common sense. As I like her I'll go with mature, for now anyway. It does seem though like marriages end in a slightly rushed way in Grey's Universe. I think usually, even after adultery, proceedings can drag on for months.

Oh and I think I really like Hahn, but you focused on that. She strikes me as someone who is very much a woman, while definitely fitting as "one of the guys." Plus it's nice to see one of these people be truly professional. Plus her thinking Mark and Derek were a couple was funny.

Alex moving from Ava to Lexie so fast seemed a bit weird, but I've gone on long enough.

[Seriously...]

Alright.

I give.

You guys still rock. Okay.

I was all, cranky/gunna leave b/c the writing was bad/witchy the whole 9...

BUT you guys do know what you are doing. Erica Hahn INCREDIBLE! My all time favorite character, bar NONE! Followed in close second by Alex, b/c of all the reasons you put way better then I can.

Yeah, I wish things w/ Mer/Der would clear up... but really, if that's what the show is based on, what would we do if they really were "Happily Ever After"??

We'd be bored.

So yeah, I'm 'letting go of the dress', you guys win.

So, could you please keep writing this season? :-)

[dan]

More Meredith and Derek please Stacy. Please tell your fellow writers not to take too long to get them back on their way.

Loved both Mer/Der and the Chief tonight. He really had that father figure thing going..but..

Christina got on my last nerve. She needs to leave Derek alone and quit amking him feel bad about meredith. Christina acts like SHE'S Meredith's girlfirend. She's helping in the breakdown of their relationship. It really got on my nerves tonight.

But the rest I loved. George was lovely. But more Mer/Der forever and if you do bring Laurne Stamile on, have her date someone besides Derek...

[Joanna]

I enjoyed this episode, but was confused by the title: what does Kung Fu Fighting have to do with anything?

[Another Greys Fan]

Erica Hahn rocks! This episode was great! The dynamic between her and Christina will be fun fun fun to watch.
Her speech to Chief was right on, and I LOVE that we have a strong female char who represents real women today. Her showing up at the Gentlemens party was classic!

Meredith is processing, I hope in the end Derek is there, open arms, her knight in shining whatever.

I didn't like the idea of Gizzie at first, but they are growing on me. TR and Katherine are wonderful actors, and their closeness for each other comes through loud and clear.
I love that Izzie goes the extra mile for her patients, even though it borders on being overly emotionally attached at times.

I'm glad Callie is letting go... she deserves to have a real true love, who will love and give her as much as she loves and gives. Please make him a man hunk! LOL

Lexi and Meredith will have bumps in the road, but I think in the end they will grow as sisters and friends.

Life is a journey, and for those of us who are dark and twisty, and didn't have the privilege of having loving supportive parents dysfunctional relationships are sometimes a given. Thank you to the writers who care and are in tuned with this struggle to capture the dark truths and hopefully will shed light in the end. Healing for Meredith needs to be a goal for this show to be successful.

I am so enjoying the season so far, and look forward to Thurs nights!!! I'm even watching PP on Wed nights... just because I do miss Addison.

Thank you again to all the writers, your dedication and sacrifices for our entertainment. I really appreciate it!

[Sarah]

Great episode! What's happening with George and Izzie? That will definitely be interesting.

[Kevin]

I thought it was a great episode. Awesome job, guys. I, for one, do not watch the show just to see "Mer/Der". The show has much more to offer than an idealized romance that people keep craving. I watch because of those little moments that are so touching and emotionally wonderful. Like Izzie preparing the OR for the bird guy. And her speech at the end (and only shaving one leg). Christina miming the operation from the observation gallery. And the bride who just doesn't get it even at the end. It's great to see Meredith finally begin to accept and put a name to her emotional lability. Oh and lastly, I'm still not buying the Gizzy of it all. Seriously. They're cute together but for me they're totally wrong. I'm kind of hoping they'll crash and burn. Apologies to all of you who like then together.

[Joyce]

Oh. My. God.

This episode was mindblowing. MIND. BLOWING. It was so friggin' good!!!

Erica Hahn is GREAT. Seriously- she is so cool. She is fresh air (and this time that IS enough ;)). The way she spoke to the chief and WHAT she said? Amazing. She clearly rocks. Loved the end, loved her participation in the gentleman's evening.

Cristina and Meredith? I love it. Period.

And George and Izzie? They did not have their perfect night, but it was so perfect, but this is love. Good love - and that is just, well.. perfect.

Mark and Derek being friends again? That has so much potential.

Callie letting go? She is tough. She is cool. She is funny and honest. Things did not work out and she is dealing with that.

George holding on to the dress? Couldn't be funnier and more metaphorically beautiful.

Izzie and the birdman? Izzie needs to stop doubting herself. She is up for a whole lot more than she understands. The scene was beautiful. And she birdman? He said more wise and true things than some of the characters did in equally life-concerning moments.

Like Mers moments. Those moments with Derek. She is opening up, but something tells me it will be too late. Don't let it be too late. Please don't. Don't let another love-interest in, for Derek (or Meredith- for that matter). Let her try, let her succeed and let them be what they really are. Hardcore. And than - let THEM succeed. Hardcore! Please.

Mer and the amazing skydiverdiverdude? I hope she made a difference for him. Loved that scene.

Love your blog.
Love this epi.
Love GA.

xox
a hardcore fan.

[Angelique]

This was a great episode the moment with Meredith and Derek proves they are soulmates and belong together so please let them be together.

Cristina is useless for Meredith. The real toxic and dysfunctional relationship Meredith has is with Cristina she is no way a friend to see her hurting that way and not really helping her. She's so selfish. She couldn't tell Derek the truth or even Merdith of what he said. I hope Meredith puts some space in between her and Cristina.

[Brandy]

Thanks guys, great show!

[Dory]

I loved this episode. In fact, it was my favorite one this season.I was proud of Meredith in this episode....she made some serious progress....perhaps not as much as some would like, but for Meredith she grew in leaps and bounds! She realizes she has issues, or 'things' and she knows she needs to deal with them. Cristina saying to her 'You know, being aware of your crap and actually overcoming your crap are two very different things.' And Mer says 'I know.' Yes, progress. She has the first part sorted, now to move on to the dealing with the issues thing and we are home and hosed! I for one can't wait!

I laughed a lot throughout this episode, particularly at Derek and Mark being so worried about a 'gentleman's evening.' Playing scrabble turned out to not be that scary....lol. Laughing is good...this was an episode I didn't want to end, because I enjoyed it that much. So, my hat is coming off!! I will take my hat off to you, because I truly loved it!

I watch this show for the couples (admittedly, mainly MerDer), the friendships, the drama, the patients...and last night didn't disappoint. Callie is getting back her backbone, which pleases me. I don't want to tell you how to write the show, that isn't my place...besides, last night proved once again why I love this show. Excellent, excellent episode. :-)

[fromdempseyshometown04240]

I loved this episode. Hahn is a great addition to the show, although I admit, it is taking me a little bit to warm up to her in certain scenes. I loved how she questioned whether Derek and Mark were gay. That was hilarious. I see some Sloan/Hahn action maybe in the future.

Alex and Lexie at the end. Meredith catches them. Say what?

Izzie crying because she is so freaking tired. Only shaving one leg. Entirely sad, but entirely funny at the same time.

I loved it when the bird guy described everyone as birds. It was perfect because his descriptions were dead on. I know that's your writing, but it was nice.

So much to talk about between Derek and Meredith. I just want Meredith to figure it out and get whole. She is definitely working towards that, I just hope it isn't too late when she finally gets there.

I loved the whole gentlemen's evening too. I loved that Derek and Mark were questioning it the whole episode.

Great episode. Can't wait until next week.

[Zhu Yongchao]

I am in China to watch this episode.
I love it.
just keep on
I am the first one to comment, hehe

[Kristina]

God I wanted to hug Derek. Twice. (Well its not like I would EVER say no to a hug with Patrick Dempsey) In the on call room, where his hope was shattered and even more so in the gallery when he opens up to Cristina of all people... I just wanted to squish him.

Might help me out too. MerDer is killing me this season. So far I love the evolving but Finnette looms in the background making it all hurt more.

I wanted to give Mer a squeeze too at the end.

I would be ok with letting them hug each other instead of me.

*sigh*

On a happy note, I just LOVE Markie and Derek's friendship. So hilarious. And Gentleman's evening was full of awesome.

[Seahorse]

It must be a girl thing - our group of girls are the Seahorses and we get calmer each year. It's the female bonding thing though - things we've been through together over the years. I have another friend whose group is the Crazy Eights. Great episode. Mer/Der need to get it right soon though.

[MeredithDerek4ever]

FINALLY some Meredith and Derek to look forward to! Thanks for that, I needed that, I am startubg to lose hope for the show with all this new Rose talk. They belong together, and Mer is realizing that, please don't set her backwards like you have in the past now that she is moving forward. And get rid of Cris's attitude, she is not Mer's friend, she is just drowing in negativity.

[Sal]

Acceptance is a hard thing... And I have to say I'm proud of the writers for letting Mer accept that she has abandonment issues, and I guess most importantly for the fans, she needs Derek as well. I hope she does something about her realizations...

I'm loving Dr Hahn. She brings a who new vibe to the show.

The "Gentleman's Evening" was funny... I'm loving how things are so much lighter this season!

Keep up the fantastic work... I hope things keep growing =)

[lisa]

TERRIFIC!