Mark Wilding on "Let The Truth Sting"...

The truth.  We like to think there’s only one version of it.  Namely, our own.  But then someone else comes along and they insist on giving you their (generally wrongheaded) version of the truth.  The truth is…there’s all sorts of truths.  The varnished truth.  The unvarnished truth.  The naked truth.  Half-truths.  Whole truths.  And what we finally addressed in this episode.  THE PAINFUL TRUTH.  The kind of truth we don’t always want to hear. 

We all have these ideas of ourselves – of how we are – so when somebody else actually weighs in about us, well, it can be a shock.  I’m going to quote the Scottish poet Robert Burns right now because I’ve always wanted to quote him and I couldn’t really figure how to cram this quote into a birthday toast or a Thanksgiving speech or a piece of wisdom I might pass on to my kids – who wouldn’t want to hear it anyway (that’s my painful truth).  Also it might lend this blog a little more class.  “If only God, the gift he gee us/To see ourselves as others see us.”  Yes, even famous Scottish poets wrote about the painful truth.

Anyway, just about everyone at Seattle Grace has to face the painful truth about themselves in this episode.  Bailey when she has to stand in front of Callie and admit that she’s been having trouble with the pecking order of things.  Callie, who is, my God, hiding from the truth because she can’t bear to hear what she just KNOWS is coming.  Okay, she doesn’t know one hundred percent KNOW, KNOW but she suspects and that’s enough to drive her underground – into the Residents Lounge.  Anything to avoid her cheating husband…

How about Lexie and Meredith?  Meredith’s served a painful, unwelcome dollop of the truth when Bailey tells her that she hasn’t said a kind word to her sister since she arrived at Seattle Grace.  And after that fact settles on Meredith, she decides she has to give Lexie the painful truth about her mother.  Meredith has been so cold to Lexie – in Lexie’s mind at least – that it’s even got her to wondering about the level of care that Susan may have received on the last day of her life.  And that scene where Meredith sits down with Lexie and starts to lay out the facts of her mom’s death – where we see Lexie finally getting the painful truth – well, let’s just say it’s one of my favorite scenes in the show.

A couple of my other favorite scenes involve Izzie and Charlie.  Shonda said she wanted Grey’s to go in a happier, lighter direction this year.  And I think this story was the kind of thing she had in mind.  A patient who wants to die, is in fact DETERMINED to die and…it’s funny and kinda heartbreaking.  And here’s a behind the scenes tidbit.  We hired the actor Jack Axelrod to be Old Guy last year.  The idea was that his room would be the place where our interns could occasionally go to study or eat.  We put Jack in a semi-coma so our gang would essentially have their own private lunch room/study hall. 

During the course of last season, we used Jack to lie in the bed and, well…just lie in the bed.  And he closed his eyes and he would shift in bed, make an occasional mouth sound and he was very good at it.  When we decided to wake him up from his year long sleep, we knew Jack was a professional actor, we just weren’t sure how good a professional actor he’d be.  At least I wasn’t.  But, my God, he was a TERRIFIC actor.  I LOVED him sparring with Izzie.  He was funny and ornery and straightforward and yet compassionate as Charlie.  Especially when it came to telling Izzie the painful truth.  That married men will string you along.  That they’re not always in the habit of telling you the truth.  And as much as Izzie didn’t want to hear what Charlie had to say, she came to appreciate him, even seek him out.  He became her friend.  And frankly, Jack was so good in the part that for a brief, fleeting moment, we even thought maybe we should keep him around.  But in the interest of good storytelling, we just couldn’t.  Which really kinda hurt…

Then there’s the subject of their sparring.  George.  Who starts out determined to tell Callie the painful truth about himself and Izzie but his interaction with Connie and her friends – sometimes the truth can be TOO painful – makes him reconsider, then finally dive in and tell Callie that he slept with Izzie.  Wait until you see him deal with the consequences of that next week.  Allan Heinberg wrote a very funny, very moving episode.  So even if you missed this episode, tune in to that one!  It’s great!

Mark and Derek also trade truths with each other.  Mark has to remind Derek about the truth of his relationship with Meredith.  That maybe he’s fooling himself and she won’t ever be all whole.  And Derek returns the truth-telling favor when he scolds Mark and the Chief for being foolhardy in trying a way too experimental surgery on Connie.  Although, he softens the blow in that same scene when he reminds the Chief to tell Adele the truth about why he wants to move back in.  That he misses her, that she’s all he can think about, etc.  Which is, truth be told, vintage McDreamy.

Finally, we get to see Bailey give our big truth-teller, Alex, the truth.  That there’s a reason we don’t listen to interns – it’s dangerous.  And then if finally falls to Alex to unload on the world’s oldest intern, Norman.  Ed Hermann is great in the part (wait until you see him next week, he’s hysterical).  Ed plays Norman as nice and avuncular and such a sweet soul.  However, despite his advanced age, the truth is Norman has a lot to learn.  After all, he’s still an intern. 

And, as we’ve discovered over the last three seasons, what can be more painful than that?

Comments

[Jamie]

Meredith and Derek are why I watch this show to begin with and we get no Mer/Der? What is this show doing?

Plus the promo with Derek and Lexie? C'mon, Shonda already told us GAME OVER on that, so give us some Mer/Der to look forward to.

They are the heart of the show, so where are they?

[David]

It was the George and Izzie hour. Thank you on behalf of 12 year olds everywhere. On behalf of the rest of the viewing public. After you wake them up....not so much.

[Mary]

Seriously, where was Meredith and Derek? What are you all doing to this show?

[Paula]

I sure hope we get more MEREDITH and DEREK love than we got this week. When they aren't on the show, it loses it's soul.

[jessicafreels]

Alex sucked tonight. Liked Edward Hermann alot and would love to se more...Gizzie still freaks me out, and I think the best scenes have been between Mark and Derek.....I LOVEd Charlie. Those were awesome. And I liked the Bailey who looks out for her interns will now look out for Callie.

[Gordon]

MORE MEREDITH and DEREK PLEASE!!!! TWO MINUTES IS NOT ENOUGH!!

[Susan]

Can't believe I'm first?

I find I'm missing the presence and dynamic of having Addison at Seattle Grace. Her new life in Los Angeles is totall boring (to viewers at least). Bring her back to Seattle Grace...for a visit at least.

[Can you keep me watching!]

So I saw a little bit of the old Grey's I use to love tonight. Welcome back, although the welcome mat may be out, the lights are still not on yet. So you haven’t gotten in yet! But it's a start from what I witnessed the back half of last season.

Thank you...for finally having movement with Mark and Derek. I have to say the only reason you got me back to actually give you a chance this season was because of Mark and Derek. Love the pace you are going with them, it's not rushed which is good, it’s realistic this way.

Bailey is back! Loved her scenes so far this season. Just hand her the award now! Looks like your starting to end George and Izzie, there is a god! Please keep this going. I don’t know anyone that wants to see this relationship at all. It’s a bit disturbing.

As for Meredith and Derek, it was nice not to see a lot of them tonight. It made the show feel better, without the angst of what was Meredith doing to Derek now. Haven’t liked Meredith the last two episodes, tonight she was tolerable. Although seeing the promo…that looks to be short lived. Should be interesting to see this new “potential love interest” for Derek. I’m looking forward to seeing what you do with that.

Great Episode Mark and Thank You for a nice blog!

[Stacie]

Looks like this season may be good after all. I hope Callie gets her revenge looks like she will finally be fighting back next week YAY. Glad Baley and Callie are going to work together those to working together will be great. From the previews look great can't wait to see what Callie does and how George deals with the aftermath of telling Callie.

[Sushi432]

Great episode! I loved the Izzie scenes, Katherine Heigl was phenominal as usual. I'm so glad George told Callie... but I wasn't too keen about the really old guy telling Izzie negative possibilities for George and Izzie's relationship. Believe it or not, I actually want to see them in a relationship, as do 50% of the audience. Oh, and this next comment is for Shonda. Shonda, I'm getting the feeling that you're making Gizzie a different tone to make it more fan friendly, which I totally support as long as this doesn't lean towards an inevitable break up due to the negative reaction from last year. It's just nice to know that this storyline is evolving to a brighter tone but I just hope Callie doesn't trap George with a baby or a guilt trip. Just not fair. Anywho, Cristina was funny as hell. She is the best comedic relief in the show. It was a nice episode... very light and fun. Definitely what you promised, Shonda. I still think you should have Derek and Mark have REAL masculine conversations. Derek always bitching about his Meredith problems just is too much. Men don't talk like that all the time. I think maybe the relationships are too prominent. I like the friendships angle but what ever happened to the surgeries? They might have become too ornamental. I would like to hear more medical jargon, as I am a future medical student, and I enjoy it.

[Thankful]

Wonderful episode! Thank you for the balance and not shoving Mer/Der misery down our throats for 20 minutes. It was so good to see Alex, Cristina and others get screen time. Meredith & Derek's drama kill the show, its so much better when its less of them. Less is more!

Excited to see a new person for Derek, can't wait!

[K]

Suprise. A well written episode and a bigger surprise is a well written blog that doesn't annoy me. Thanks Mark.

I love a proffesional Meredith who doesn't whine about her "perfect" McDreamy. She can do better.

[AnotherGreysFan]

Wonderful awesome episode!! Greys is back!! By the time the finale of last season came I was seriously considering not watching this show anymore; but, I told myself I'd give it 3 episodes.

Thank you for your blog Mark, and thank all the other writers too! I'm looking forward to this season!!!

Namaste'

[Finally!]

This episode is what I have been waiting for, this was Grey's! Thank you Mark for a wonderful episode.

All characters had time tonight, it wasn't the Meredith & Derek show. Much appreciated. Thank you for giving Alex some time, he's overdue.

Loved everything tonight.

[Jessica]

I liked a lot of this episode. I just miss Meredith and Derek. But I loved that you stopped making Meredith so cold at least for this episode. She's my favorite character and she's never cold, so it was nice to have her back.

I really actually liked the Bailey/Callie moment in this and boy, Callie was awesome. I so felt for her and I don't want to see that character destroyed. She's wonderful.

Let's see Mer and Der work it out. Love all the characters on this show (even Alex) Will see you next week. Jessica

[Frank]

I love that you are giving Mark more of a heart this season, but seriously, he needs to quit pcking on Meredith so he can get close to Derek. It's like he's trying to destroy their relationship more than help Derek.

Other than that, love Mark, love Alex and LOVE Meredith and Derek. They light up the screen. :)

[maryrose]

Hey, usually I dig your promo's, but tha tnew one wasn't so good. But this episode had some nice moments (especially with the Chief) adn I liked Mer with Lexie. That was nice.

Good job.

[Claire]

a little less of that george and izzie nonsense and this show will rock again. It's not the George and Izzie hour. There is Bailey, Alex and Christina you know? I hope that ends soon as it's giving me a headache for sure.

[B]

I am very critical of Grey's Anatomy epsiodes... so I must say that I absolutely loved this one. It was funny and charming. My favorite scenes are the mer/der ones but I seemed to get along fine without them tonight.

[loving grey's]

I really liked the show tonight. I think coming off of last season, I might just be a little hard on it, expecting too much. It's no longer all the talk at my office anymore, but I still am hanging in there.

[Teresa]

Loved the episode. Have to say that I think Grey's is regaining the initial vibe that drew me to the show: dysfunctional, fun, funny, and wicked brilliant at using absolutely extreme situations to illustrate universal truths. Katie Heigl is quite possibly my favorite fake doctor now.

But side note, I know you guys have docs on the writing staff or at least docs that are associated with the show. I have issues with the Broca's area lesion causing nonsensical speech. Broca's area should cause expressive aphasia, that is, kid shouldn't have been able to speech efficiently. Him stuttering out short, sensical but out of context phrases would have been correct (ex. to the bathroom). Him saying something odd, yet having no difficulties speaking, is much more consistent with a receptive aphasia, or lesion of Wernicke's area. I don't buy the Broca's area lesion caused by hydrocephalus. Sorry, in my neuro block in med school.

But great job.

[Chiccolove]

I am getting impatient Shonda! 3 episodes and we have gotten a total of 5 minutes of Meredith and Derek?! What's the deal? Are you just setting us up? I hear a new girl is coming and she BETTER NOT be for Derek. Because if she is, I think you will regret that. Your show is treading water as it is.
I want growth Dammit! Either allow Mer/Der to grow as a couple or for god sakes just put Mer/der fans out of their misery already. 3 years we have put up with this. And I for one and not going to wait any longer! I don't care about Gizzie. I want Mer/Der. And I want them NOW!
At this point I believe you really don't give a crap about your fans. You talk a good talk Shonda in saying that you care what fans say. But do you? Or do you just like the fact that you think that making us angry is a good thing? WEll, it's NOT! Push us too far and we may never come back! I am tired of waiting for Mer/der growth. I give you til the end of this month. And then I am OUT!

[Dena]

This episode still made me sad. Please, please, let our beloved characters finally have good things happen, make good things happen, and actually get to have happy, functional relationships, please?
How long do Derek, Izzy, bitter Alex, George, Callie, Meredith, et al have to suffer? At least Cristina has a reason -that's mainly out of her control - finally someone who's not causing their own unhappy, dysfunctional relationship for no realistic reason.

Meredith? How long is she gonna be broken and whiny, devastated by her parents (or lack thereof), dark and damaged? All she wanted the whole first and second season was Derek. Despite her bad mom and absent dad, she loved him and was able to have a relationship with him!

Meredith told Derek to "love me, choose me, pick me!" She was all ready and eager to love him. Then there was Addison - who Derek unexplicably decided to stay with for a while. Then Finn, and Mer unrealistically not being able to choose. Then when Mer finally woke up and realized, "wait, all I've wanted is Derek, and now he wants and loves me too!" then he had to go and decide he needed space and didn't really want her just then after all!
For such amazing, talented writers whom I adore, please, enough contrived complications for the short-sighted sake of ratings, please?

When Derek and Meredith finally started over (yep, again), they got to be happy for all of 2 or 3 episodes. Wonderful episodes of finally being (or growing towards being) "bright and shiny."
Then Meredith goes from confiding in her mom that she is happy, finally really happy, to suddenly being depressed, suicidally depressed, broken and incapable of communicating with Derek. Could we pour it on any thicker than first having Mer almost let herself drown, then have her mom die, and then her surrogate mom die at her hands/on her watch? Oh wait, we can. Next Meredith's dad blames her, violently screams at her, and wants nothing to do with her (again - except this time yell at her). Her recently-trying dad does a 180 and bitterly insults her and cuttingly reject hers. Doesn't Mer need some good in her story line after her own meek father slaps her and tells her not to come to her surrogate mom's funeral? Instead, he pours salt on the raw wound, saying Susan wouldn't want her there, that he didn't want her there, and I believe didn't even want to look at her. He goes on that Susan trusted her, he trusted her, and Meredith killed the woman who was his life.

We can't even get Meredith turning to Derek, who should be her rock, the man who loves her and who she spent 2 seasons yearning for and mooning over. She went from wanting him more than anything to rejecting him, not even wanting him to support her at the funeral or telling him about the scene with her dad. What happened to the protagonist I used to respect and admire?

what happened to the smart, capable, knowledgeable, admirable, strong Meredith we fell in love with during the first season, the smash hit season we all miss?

The episodes are still more depressing than I can bear. I keep watchin in hopes of a "light and happy" season, but keep getting disappointed!

Poor long-suffering Derek. Poor Meredith. Poor love-lorn Izzie, poor jilted Cristina, poor miserable Callie, poor George (once again), poor wifeless Chief, poor demoted-feeling Bailey, poor lost Mark, poor bitter mean/jealous/projecting? Alex. Poor sad Grey's fans who get depressed after each episode, instead of entertained and made to feel good during their rare bit of "leisure" or TV-"enjoying" time!

I know you're all capable of better - of happier, funnier, lighter, more heart-warming episodes! please???????

[Sam (doc)]

What has happened to my beloved show? This is getting pathetic!!! I just posted regarding 4.02 and now am rambling about 4.03. I’m just so sick of Meredith and Cristina.

I’ve almost come to the conclusion that Meredith and Cristina have a very sick relationship. Meredith still predicates her relationship with Derek on Cristina – on whether or not Cristina would be hurt if she knew about them? How old is she? 2? How sick and childish is that. I’ve said this before. Cristina and Meredith are both enablers to each other and have an extremely unhealthy, codependent relationship (might apply to Mer/Der at this point, as well). Cristina is almost always so insensitive, warped and mean, it is almost scary and Meredith nowadays isn’t far behind. Can they ever show compassion anymore? They are both so self-absorbed. They both need to have long-term, ongoing therapy or have a mental breakdown in order, hopefully, to get their act together. (And don’t give the stupid excuse that they have been through year after year of science and school and haven’t lived, etc., etc. BS!!! I have been that entire route as have several of my dearest friends – going to prestigious undergrad and then Yale, Duke, Harvard, Johns Hopkins, Columbia, Washington University, Stanford, for med school. We are not emotionally retarded. We have compassion and warmth and know how to treat people well, all people. We know how to have great relationships with our spouses, significant others, have great families and kids, and know what is important in life. Bailey gets this. She is very firm when she needs to be, yet knows what exactly to tell the burned car salesman when he and his wife were worried about his face – that the most important thing is having people that love you and loving people back; that the one motherless girl who she explained tampons too (and life) was the only patient for that first day in the clinic and worth every penny of 8 million dollars. That is how you touch people’s lives and potentially change their lives forever – heal them wholistically and inspire. Help them feel the connectedness of the human bond, flaws and all. You GA people have a venue here to effect change, to touch so many people’s lives – for God sakes, do it. Look at S1 and 2. You did it then.)

Anyway, how do you think Derek feels when Meredith hides their relationship from her bf? How does Derek feel when Meredith says she wants to be a good friend, she wants to take care of Cristina – yet what kind of friend is she to Derek? NOT!!!!How does she take care of Derek, NOT, except for sex, which he will eventually feel empty and feel a void from, because they aren’t connecting emotionally and he always longs for more from their relationship. Derek was absolutely right when he said that Mer being with him to her meant she was “cheating on Cristina.” How sick is that? I think she and Cristina both need to undergo ECT (shock therapy) to stun them into feeling, into humanness. They should just forget about everyone else and go live together and take care of each other in their stunted way, totally in denial. Mer says that Cristina is her sister and her only family and her person, all she has. What an insult to Derek. Then, quit using Derek for sex and run off with Cristina.

I learned long ago that you can be the most brilliant, talented person around, but if you can’t relate well with people, have compassion, bond, then you’ll never be a “success” in life. Yes, they might become great surgeons one day, but live their lives in bitterness and desperation and be as cold as Ellis if they never learn to "let people in." It is really uncomfortable to watch them both be so stone cold. Bailey had to tell Meredith to talk to Lexie. Lexie’s mom just died. Her dad is an alcoholic wreck. She is a sweet, innocent girl. (Meredith should at least have some sympathy and compassion, knowing what a wonderful, loving woman Susan was. But, no, she is too wrapped up into her own issues to even think of anyone else's feelings. It was different with Ellis – she had Alzheimers and virtually died five years before. It is a blessing when Alz. patients die – I know from experience.) Even when Meredith talked to Lexie about her mom, it was still very mechanical and cold. Derek should dump Meredith’s ass right now. Sex is not worth it. It will become cheap and unfulfilling. She doesn’t appreciate him and needs to realize what she has – a willing partner who is presently ready to commit and work out their relationship (I know he has his faults, too, but he is at least willing to try and Meredith won’t even try to help herself overcome her issues.I can’t stand it when people know and won’t even try to better themselves!!!!). Cristina and Meredith deserve each other and I don’t mean that in a kind way. They need to get some help. It’s beyond uncomfortable to watch. If someone would have told me I would EVER have thought this about Meredith and Derek, I would have said NEVER in a zillion years -–how in three seasons could you go from the most incredible, passionate, adorable, flirty,in-love couple ever to grace TV to a wretched mess – Unbelievable!!!!!Shame on you!!! This isn’t FUN!!!! It’s childish, it’s immature! It’s sick, sick, sick, sick and getting way too hard to watch.

(You have to remember – most people who go into medicine are compassionate people who want to help others. Out of 5 interns, you have 2 ½ who are asses (George and Izzie have always been warm and compassionate, at least to their patients) – ½ is Meredith because she used to be kind and compassionate. Alex is mean again, cruel – what he said about George being a repeater and how he derogatorily talks to his interns– and Cristina is an ass (the same demeaning behavior as Alex with her interns, Izzie, etc). She can barely relate to any of her patients except in her cold, hard-hearted way. In 1.03, Bailey tried to teach her how to talk to Mrs. Stevenson and her daughter when her husband was brain dead from the Dead Baby Bike race and they wanted to harvest his organs. There have been numerous other examples of her being so cold and mechanical when talking with patients. I know she does have a softness somewhere deep inside, but it is exhausting watching her constantly cover it up – same with Meredith. They are both just becoming too exhausting and Derek feels the same way with Meredith. When someone is so locked down, it’s really impossible to relate to them on anything but a very superficial level, hence the current status of Derek and Meredith. If now, it is just about sex and mockery, he’d be better off looking at porn than trying to deal with Meredith. She will barely even talk to him and treats him like crap most of the time. It is much worse to be lonely in a “relationship” than to be lonely while alone. Derek will have no problem finding someone who can truly love him – his whole person, not just his penis, at least until Meredith (hopefully) gets shocked into getting her act together.

P.S. I have done a residency. You run into the occasional surgeon who is an arrogant SOB, but not most of them. Believe me – medicine is NOT the field to go into just to make money or be on an ego trip – there are easier ways, i.e., business, law etc. that don’t take nearly as much schooling and ridiculously long hours before you can even start to practice. Most doctors do have compassion. But, the take home message you are sending out is it doesn’t matter how emotionally stunted, warped, uncaring, self-centered you are as long as you can learn the techniques, you’ll be a great surgeon and doctor. Think again – this is the farthest from the truth. (Remember - even Cristina said that George was the best intern.) People heal not just physically, but intellectually, emotionally, spiritually. They heal by feeling that people care about them, sincerely care, not just mouthing the words. And before you can give to others and really be the best physician possible, there is a huge lesson to be learned here in the case of some of SGH docs: “Physician, Heal Thyself!”

[Jeffrey Bryan]

Christina's LVAT line....

BEST

QUOTE

EVER