Shonda Rhimes on "The Other Side of This Life"

Original airdate: 5/3/07

So I owe you an explanation.  For this episode (for these two episodes, I should say).  I owe you that.  You’ve stuck with me through Season Three and now you want answers, damn it!  You want an explanation.

You are preaching to the proverbial choir.  If you were a preacher and I was a choir.   Which…I’m not a choir cause I can’t sing but maybe you are actually a preacher and…rambling.  The point is, when I watch TV and things happen like the Scooby Gang raises Buffy out of her scary grave or Felicity goes back in time or they take their sweet time telling me what those numbers mean over on Lost...I get a little nutty.  I sometimes get irate.  Because these are my shows.  These are my people.  These are my FRIENDS THESE WRITERS ARE MESSING WITH.

I don’t say this lightly.  I am a hardcore TV watching fanatic.   I was deprived of it as a kid.  So now, as an adult, I am deep into it.   I dig my TV.   So when shows take leaps, I go a little out of my mind.

I go a little out of my mind, I shake my fist to the heavens, I tear at my hair and I ask the writing gods “WHY?!!!!” 

“WHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!!!!!!!”

I go all drama on my own ass and then I lie back down on the sofa and keep watching.   Mainly because I’m lazy and shaking one’s fist to the heavens is exhausting.  But also because I’m interested in seeing what happens next.  And because the writers have asked me to leap and so I’m gonna leap with them.

Also because, now?   Now I get it.  I so totally get it.  It’s freakin’ gotten.

Here’s what happened to me:

I was sitting in the editing room one day watching Mer and Burktina and the gang doing all the stuff they do.  I love the editing room – it’s like this cocoon where I’m alone with the characters (and the editor) and it’s where I get a lot of my ideas.  And for the first time ever since working on this show, I got an idea that was Grey’s Anatomy but…not Grey’s Anatomy.  It was something else.  It was Addison driving down the freeway with her hair blowing all over her face.  So I started writing it down, this not Grey’s Anatomy idea.  I started writing it down in secret because I knew Betsy and Shoots With No Script would very gently explain that I had lost my mind and then send in the guys with the strait jackets.  Because we are very busy here at Greys.  We don’t have time for non-Grey’s ideas.  We are a hard-working people.

Except I had this idea and it had already worked its way under my skin and I had to write it down.   Or else I’d get in one of those moods.  Things happen when I’m in those moods.  Things like Meredith drowning.  And I love Mer and wanted to keep her away from the water.  So I wrote it down.   And I gave it to the studio and the network.

It became something.  A script that was part-Grey’s, part something else.  And then it became news around town and suddenly my tiny little written down something was being paid a lot of attention by the outside world.  Next thing you know, they’re calling it a spinoff.

This episode, it’s NOT a spinoff.  It’s Addison going down to LA to complete the story we’ve been laying out for her for two seasons.  It’s the culmination of Meredith’s family story.  It’s Burktina and the wedding and Izzie, Callie and George and that hideous triangle they are stuck in.  It’s the beginning of the end of Season Three.

And I’m warning you now: the ride to the end of the season?  You may want to buckle up and store your luggage in the overhead compartment because this ride is gonna be bumpy.  I’ll explain more after the finale.  I’ll talk about where we are headed in Season Four.   Because I think Season Four is gonna rock.  The fun is back in Season Four.   But for right now, I guess I’ll just talk about the here and the now.  About what is right in front of us.

So.  Even though we took this detour down to Los Angeles, what I want to talk about is what happened in Seattle.  To Meredith.  To Cristina.  To Izzie.  Because things are not working out the way they planned.  George is leaving for Mercy West and Izzie feels responsible.  Cristina’s facing the fact that she’s going to have to compromise what she wants yet again for Burke.  And Meredith…well, Meredith is losing another mother.  Worse, she’s losing her father.  And even worse than that, she may be losing Derek.

But my favorite moment is Alex.  Who, when Ava asks him what happened to him that has made it so hard for him to connect, simply shrugs and says “Maybe I don’t remember.”  He remembers.  But he can’t face up to it.  Not yet.  Alex is the guy we know the least about and the one struggling the most.  And I kinda love him for it.  Because he wants to be a better guy – he’s just not sure he IS a better guy.

In this episode, our people in Seattle all hit a crossroads while our girl in Los Angeles finds a new road altogether.  I’m hoping you like the new road.  I’m hoping I get a chance to show you how good this road can be. 

But for now, the detour is over.  Now, we’ve got the last two episodes of this season to bring to you.  Where we are going might make you shake your fists to the heavens and scream.  But we are leaping.  So, if your sofa is comfy, maybe you could lie back down and leap with us?

Comments

[Lindsay Gwen]

I truly feel like you ARE messing with my friends out there writers. I want them to work out! I'm trying to take a leap but I don't know about this. It's a tad too soap-operish. It's leaning away from all the great speeches and moments and music into who's sleeping with who. I think the writers should take a day and watch season 1 straight though. Then watch the last 5 episodes of season 3 - they have a totally different feel. Be true to Grey's and stop trying to thrill your audience because you're in danger of loosing them.

[Dedicated Fan]

I agree, I tuned in to watch Greys...and got very little Greys and a lot of the spinoff episode (which to be honest, doesn't look like it has that much potential). I must say that I was disappointed and look forward to next week when we get a full episode of Greys back.

P.S: If you ruin MerDer, I'll be so sad :(:(...and Izzie and George, so great!

[Anon]

Sorry Shonda - I love you and all - but Derek in a bar with someone young chick? I don't care how many issues Meredith has, that is just totally unacceptable boyfriend behavior. He's not McDreamy anymore.

[Canadian fan]

Shonda, I was okay with last nights epi, even with the intermingling of Addison in L.A and GA which so many are furious about.
What I am not okay with is you destroying Mer/Der. You are writing McDreamy as a McPrick and I am getting to the point where if he doesn't step up to the plate I am going to lose it. Patrick D. may as well hang up his scrubs and start looking for other opportunities if this is the direction his character is going to continue taking. And by this I mean the promo clip of him in the bar with the chick offering to buy him a drink. All I'm saying is she better be his sister or he better shut her down or that's it for McDreamy in my books.

[Nikki]

Shonda-I'm gonna venture out and say you better buckle up and enjoy what's left of your ride because it may be coming to a screeching halt if the previews are "true" and Derek gets himself another woman. That will kill it for a bunch of us since-day-1-loyal Grey's watchers. Seriously? I mean Seriously? Are you SERIOUSLY going to have Derek go there?

[Rachael]

I am trying to be receptive to the idea. I really am. I love Addison. I think she's amazing. She's my favorite woman from Grey's and I think the thing that is scaring me most is if she moves on to the spin-off and something happens and it doesn't work out. I love Addie and I need to see her on one show, though I'd rather see her on Grey's. I just don't want to be without any Addie in my tv viewing week. I just want reassurance that she will be safely returned to Grey's if something should happen to the spin-off.

[Frannie]

O.K. Shonda. I'll leap with you. I'm too curious not to do it. Last night's episode was way too strange for me though. It made me uncomfortable because I didn't know what was going to happen and everyone is so confused! But that's how life is, isn't it? You know that and you keep pushing the viewers to know that, too. I'm shaking my fists and leaping off my couch in frustration. How great is that?!

[Erica]

I never thought I’d say this because I really, really, really love Meredith and Derek together, but I’d rather see them definitely broken-up than watch them go through this back and forth pain and torture thing again. It is seriously just too painful to watch. Not fun. Not entertaining. Just painful. I hope you don’t break them up. I hope by the end of the season they really commit to each other and we can feel comfortable knowing they’ll be together throughout the rest of the series. My ultimate preference: keep them together. I love watching them knowing they’re together. Then I can take Meredith getting slapped by her father or Derek being in contemplative turmoil over some decision he can’t make. But if you’re going to have them together, do something soon so we know they’ll be together in the long run. Don’t do the wait til the end of the series thing with these two. That would just be too tragic, too much of a waste of their love for each. And too much of a tragedy for the show. Grey’s Anatomy is at its best when people are in their respective relationships.

I know the television model for the main couple is to keep them apart until the end of the series. But that model applied to Meredith and Derek has gotten to be too painful to watch and will ruin interest and support for the couple. I would hate to see that happen.

All of that being said, though, I did love last night's episode. I just don't know how much more I can take of Meredith and Derek being in constant pain over each other.

[Frannie]

O.K. Shonda. I'll leap with you. I'm too curious not to do it. Last night's episode was way too strange for me though. It made me uncomfortable because I didn't know what was going to happen and everyone is so confused! But that's how life is, isn't it? You know that and you keep pushing the viewers to know that, too. I'm shaking my fists and leaping off my couch in frustration. How great is that?!

[leap of faith... in doubt]

Shonda, you're asking a lot, when you say you don't care about what we think. It's a leap I'm no certain I want to invest in - not for Mer losing Derek. You've killed our McDreamy the last 2 shows. How COULD he not go after her.

[Brittany]

I hated the combined show with the Seattle and LA storylines. They just seemed too different from each other. It didn't flow to me. If you had aired Addison's show on its own, maybe I would have liked it better. However, the way it was presented, I was way more interested in what was going on in Seattle. And we only got 30 minutes of that. It better get much better than this!

Now, that I got that out of my system, I do love Greys and I can't wait to see what happens.

I was extremely disappointed with last nights episod. I was waiting for one whole week for a 2-hour special. Oh...the thoughts of what two hours would be like. But I felt the storyline focused way too much on Addison's journey. If I was counting, I'd say only 15 minutes of the 2 hours was really Grey's . I love Addison, but every other scene was not Grey's or Addison. I really didn't care to watch the guest characters. I screamed at the TV each time a new frame came on and it was "the other characters". If you wanted to focus on Addison, leave out the other nonsense.

That being said, I did love the Grey's moments - even though limited. I love the scene where Meredith says, "Now's not the time to give up on me." McDreamy has such a wonderful smile!

And why is there only two more episodes? Can't there be three or four more, at least????

[Jane]

The elevator scene was disgusting! Gizzie is - and I will use Shonda's words HIDEOUS! I just so hope it stops soon - Izzie and George are better than that - Great Friends NOTHING MORE! Here was the opportunity to explore the Callie/George relationship, to build on it and it hasn't even been given a chance! And Poor Izzie - Denny dies, Alex cheats and she end up with what - a married man who is her best friend? Please! Give the characters their decency back and allow them to develop. Sure they will stumble on the way but give them a chance. The only thing I loved from the episode was Mark/Derek conversation. About time Eric gets to play some scenes that show his true prowess as an actor. Gizzie so thumbs down! To quote George from season two - "McVomitt"

[Steph]

Okay, I'm trusting you. I'm trusting you not to screw up, kill, or make disappear my best friend Addison here. I'm nervous, and I'm anxious, but I'm closing my eyes and jumping. And I'm trusting you. I'm trusting you now to let me fall. I love the characters. I really, really do, but I'm scared, I'm so scared because I love Addison so much. And I'm sad. I'm sad because I love Maddison, and I feel so bad for Mark and I love him, and I believe, I really still believe that Mark and Addison could be really good together. I'm going to need time, time to accept and get over that dream, because I wanted so badly for it to happen. But I'm trusting you, and I'm taking the leap. Don't let me down, Shonda, I'm giving you yet another chance, and trusting you.
I must warn you, though...it's going to take a lot to keep me watching Grey's. I was hardcore in it for Addison, and now? Now I don't know. Because everyone else? I don't love them so much (except Mr. Ex-manwhore). I don't love them like I should, like I used to, and I feel guilty, extremely guilty. I trust you, I am trusting you.

[Christa]

I am glad that you are saying that season four will be fun....the old Grey's. Unfortunately I am not sure I will be around. I can NOT take anymore of the ass kicking you give Meredith every freaking episode. It's just sad at this point. It's beyond soapish.

I will say this...the fastest way to lose your most devoted, watched since the very first episode, RABID Grey's fans is to see Derek flirt, or cheat on Meredith in anyway. She lost her mom, her fake mommy, her father, she DIED, had to endure that flipping stupid afterlife...came back to a boyfriend who said "hey.", then told her that "I will ALWAYS be here", and now he's so selfish and dispicable that he wants to leave her...or even THINK about leaving her...it's just WRONG. The stupid promo monkeys better be messing with us. That's all I have to say, or I will be gone. I have other shows I love....just not as much.

I am sitting here typing so furiously because I am so ANGRY at what you have done to my friends at Seattle Grace. I used to LOVE these characters. Now everytime I see Izzie Stevens I want to spit at her, I see George and I want to beat him until he's good and bloody, I see Derek and I think, "awesome hair, but you are a total JERK!".....

My husband and I used to wait in anticipation for Sunday nights....then season three happened. It's just gotten worse and worse for me. This has been a dark and disturbing season. You obviously hate marriage, and cheating is OK, as long as it's the BFF's for life GIZZIE.....GAG.

I had so much that I planned to write, but I guess it's just not worth it. We have been complaining for weeks and you just don't care. You have won awards, and now you think that every crazy idea you get is award winning. You don't care about your viewers.

I am just so sad.

Oh, and Addison's show is lacking in chemistry, and I was totally NOT into it...I was actually VERY annoyed.

Seriously, I fell in love with Greys from like the first nano second because it was fun and sexy and provocative but now it's just depressing. I fell in love with the characters of season one because they were fresh- they weren't like every other character on TV and most of all, I fell in love with all that is Mer/Der but now, they're just a tiny dot on the radar- either they get NO storyline and when they do, it's one where they might be losing each other. They symbolized true love and fairytailes- they were that couple that gave everyone hope that their McDreamy is out there some where and now, they're dying as a couple. I understand that you need character progression and development but come on! You're killing them... and breaking our hearts right along with them. Season two was heart-wrenching- a continuous sob fest but at least they were emotionally connected. Seriously Shonda, you expect us to leap but you are giving us no hope that we're going to land safely.
The one moment that made the two hours of last night almost tolerable was the Mark and Derek scene because I strongly believe in that friendship and both Patrick and Eric did a fantastic job in that scene. Other than that, last night was pure torture.
Hoping for something better next week.
P.S. Please don't ruin a good thing- Grey's Anatomy is one of the only decent shows out there, please keep it that way. Oh and Addison is fabulous on Grey's- she's wonderful because of her interaction with everyone else and she adds to the flavor of the show and as much as I love the actors you have for the possible spin off, there's just no chemistry there- none with each other and none with Addison. Again, please don't ruin one of the only decent things on television. Please bring back the Grey's that we fell in love with.

[Claire]

Please don't break up the Meredith and Derek characters. It does not have to be a "fairytale" but we started this series with the two of them and I would just love to think that we could watch this couple grow and learn from each other the way so many people do in life.

It does not have to be perfect, but it's just a joy to watch these two weekly. I never really felt they had the chance to learn things from each other that could further them as people. I also miss the happy, sexy and smart times these two have together will return in season four.

The character Meredith has lost so much already. Can't she plesse just have this one bit of life that we as viewers have shared with her?

I know I'm just a viewer and what you have planned is already done and ready to be shown in the next couple of weeks, but I so wish that this season could end without me wondering what will happen to these two again the way it has the last two seasons.

Please give the fans of this couple since season one something to look forward to in the new excited season four!

Thank you so much,

Claire

[Savita]

I'm sorry and I"m sure you won't post this, but I just want you to know that you've lost a viewer. This show has turned into the awful cliche soap opera that I always thought you stood against. Goodbye Grey's - you've lost another viewer.

[coffeeaddict]

i loved Addison's journey, i love her and will watch wherever she goes. . . and let's be honest, no one at the Oceanside is dried up!!! I'm nervous about George and Callie and Izzie. I love them all and don't want any of them to get hurt (but especially not my Callie). I have to watch George and Izzie's scenes with my hands over my eyes and my stomach in knots! oh gosh darn it, I have no choice but to leap I love Seattle Grace and everyone in so much! Plus, sometimes fist-shaking is part of the fun of being so into TV. Don't worry Shonda I'm way into my TV too!

[Jill]

It was only 32 minutes of Grey's, and we know you cut a lot out based on promo pics, but it was a wonderful and heartbreaking 32 minutes and I may, just may, tune in to this Not Quite A Spin-off thing. For Taye Diggs, Tim Daly, and Amy Brenneman, who stole the show when I stopped obsessing over how we only had 32 minutes of Grey's.

George and Izzie love each other and should be together. Please bring this triangle to an end, let them all have some happiness again. Ellen and Jeff WERE incredibly and I would have liked to see that storyline fully drawn out instead of shortened for the sake of Addison's show. And I'm very glad to hear that season four will be funny. Three words: hot-dog eating contest!

[wow!]

Overwhelming disappointment in what you've done to mer/der.
She looses someone else she loves, and he walks away, again! He needed to go in and join them in a drink.
McDreamy no more - you always want to exceed expectations, and with this, the supposed main characters, you've miserably failed. I have it all of season 2, season 3 in the hopes of some growth in their relationship, but next week's promo is a slap in the face.

[SS]

FIX MEREDITH AND DEREK.
HATED THE EPISODE.
ONE MORE TIME - POOR MER AND DER AT THE END OF THE SEASON, YOUR RATINGS ARE GOING NO WHERE BUT DOWN.

[emma again]

i posted my previous comment before i read the whole blog...meredith may be losing derek? i thought you said season four was gonna bring the fun back. honestly i define fun as my fav couple having a good time NOT spending episode after episode getting back together and then having issues and more issues and more issues!! come on please let them work this out i know that they can...she said dont' give up on me, why can't she just let him in for once this season? i'm really hoping you make them okay by the season finale or else you'll be getting a really pissed blog entries (along with many others i'm sure)

by the way i apologize for the hostility in this post...i can get a little too emotional concerning grey's considering it's my favorite show and remember you ARE one of my favorite writers :) keep the good episodes coming shonda, thank you!!

[Teresa]

I love Grey's! Shonda, your writing is superb as usual!!!The best thing about Addison's road trip was her kiss with Tim Daly.WOW!!! I am ready for the ride!

[tanya]

FIX MER/DER PLEASE DO NOT RUIN OUR SHOW