Some thoughts on Meredith, Derek, and faith...

"Save Me"

Original Airdate 5/15/05

Two more episodes from season 1 will air tonight. The first episode was written by the ultra-talented Mimi Schmir, who also wrote season 2's episode "Let it Be." You might remember "Let it Be" because it includes the single most memorable Meredith-Derek moment in the whole series -- when he's behind her in the elevator, only inches away, trying with all his might not to touch her because he's already chosen to stay with Addison. Meredith: "I miss you." Derek: "I can't."  It's a painful moment not just for them, but for every viewer rooting for them.

On the other hand, when "Save Me" first aired last year, it had no such painful moment.  It had the exact opposite.  The big scene at the end between Meredith and Derek -- the one where we see his trailer for the first time -- is romantic and sweet and refreshing. No pain to be found.

Throughout the episode, Meredith wants to know more about Derek.  They're finally in what looks like an actual relationship -- but she doesn't even know where he lives.  What his family is like. What kind of music he listens to.  Nothing. Who is this guy who's been waking up next to her in bed for a week?

And that leads up to this great Meredith and Derek scene. (here's the actual page from the script)

EXT. FIELD - NIGHT

Derek and Meredith walk through the field.  The stars are out.  He marches her up to an Airstream trailer which is parked on the grass.  Its lights are on. 

     MEREDITH
Where are we?

     DEREK
Shut up.  -- My mother's maiden name is Maloney. 
I have four sisters, eight nieces and five nephews.
I like coffee ice cream, single malt Scotch and
occasionally a good cigar.  I fly fish, I cheat when I
do the Sunday crossword puzzle and I don't dance
in public.  My favorite color is blue.  And not that
light blue.  Indigo.  The Sun Also Rises?  Favorite
novel.  The Clash?  Favorite band.  This tiny little
scar by my nose?  That's why I don't ride motor-
cycles anymore.  And I live in that trailer!  And
all this land is mine and I have no idea what I'm
gonna do with it!!  That's it, that's all you've earned. 
For now.  The rest...well, the rest you'll have to
take on faith.

Beat.  He searches her face.  Hopeful.  Waiting to see what she'll do.

     MEREDITH (V.O.)
Once in a while, people may even take your breath away.   

She holds out her hand.  He takes it. 

     MEREDITH
Nice castle.

And they go inside.

     MEREDITH (V.O.)
That's what you have to believe.

Shonda tells us that Grey's Anatomy is about fairy tales.  That scene could be the end of one. In an episode about Faith, Meredith finally learns to have some faith of her own. Faith in Derek.

However, that faith is tested in a later episode, "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head." When Derek takes Meredith back to his trailer, he tells her just how badly Addison hurt him, why he had to leave New York, and what Meredith has meant to him since he arrived ("You were like coming up for fresh air," he says).

And remember what Meredith says?  "That's not enough."

And remember how you shouted at your screen "NOT ENOUGH?!? HOW CAN THAT NOT BE ENOUGH!?!?"

The above scene is why Meredith says that.

"The rest...well, the rest you'll have to take on faith."

That is why this scene is so painful to watch now -- just as painful as the elevator scene in "Let it Be" -- because we know what "the rest" is.

Not only did Derek not tell Meredith about Addison, but he told her everything except that, and then asked her to have faith in him.

And when Meredith takes his hand, she's believing in him.

And then in the next episode the fairy tale comes crashing down.

I don't know about you, but if that were me, I'd have trouble ever trusting that man again...  Just something to keep in mind, not just as you rewatch the episode tonight, but, well, as you watch every episode that comes after (including those for this upcoming season).

-Eric

Comments

[Lynnie]

BUT...

Alex was a jerk, but he's losing his total jerkiness. And Cristina has been mean to Burke at times, yet we know that she loves him. Oh, and Addison started out being her own case of relationship syphilis, but we know that she has redeeming qualities, even if she has more chemistry with either Alex or McSteamy than she does with her own husband. So, Derek can't be redeemed? Yes, he absolutely should have told Meredith on numerous occasions. You can't write him out of that self-made mess? You have everybody else. You even have made us sympathetic to the totally unprofessional behavior of Izzy.

I suppose I don't care one way or the other, except that I adore PD's Derek and think he and Burke are the sexiest pseudo-doctors that have ever lived on the screen. So, I like seeing both of them in love. The scene at the end of "As We Know It" was beautiful and romantic without sex as was the supply closet scene. I don't understand writing all the great Mer/Der scenes if Der blew it forever by asking her to have faith. He really believed his marriage was over, and it was PAINFUL. That pain is why he's tried to make it with Addison, but it isn't working because his heart is elsewhere. Even that adorable vet can't overcome what's between Meredith and Derek. That's how you've written it. Now, if Meredith is going to finally grow a spine, that would be one thing. She probably should stand alone for some time, and then they can start over again with full disclosure.

It may just be me, but I don't understand splitting up the couple with the most on screen chemistry. Okay, let me qualify that, Burke and Cristina have it in spades too. I really don't think, however, that people are tuning in to watch the latest medical cases or to watch Callie live in the hospital basement, seemingly without the knowledge of security or hospital maintenance.

But it's your show, and you've kept me watching so far.

[Marcia]

Shonda, please let us know what really happened between Addison and Derek in NY (I get the Mark thing, the being absent and indifferent thing, but I believe there's a lot more there)! It would be awesome to see how they got together in the first place, wedding memories or some kind of flashback... It would explain a lot of things about their behavior. Addison AND Derek cannot let go of this marriage, even though both of them did some unbelievably stupid things, even though there is so much pain. WHY is that? I read somewhere that they had a child that died. Is it true? Speaking of which: why don't they have children? They don't seem like the kind of couple that would choose not to have kids, especially since they married young (they have been together 11 years, right?).

[Maura]

Oops! I posted the word characters in my previous post earlier this morning when talking about Patrick and Ellen. I of course meant to say main cast members!
To bad you can't preview your comment before posting it. LOL!

[Annette]

I just want to thank you for posting those lines. I read them over in my head and hear the voices of the characters, I sense the apprehension, I feel the meaning in a profound way, just was I hear and sense and feel when I'm watching the show. That's part of the beauty and the power of GA. So thank you.

[Marcia]

Shonda, seriously, what's the deal with Callie? Only two episodes with her have aired in Brazil, and so far I kinda like her. I've been reading the posts about her being crazy, and I just had to ask. Please, don't make Callie a pshycho, George needs a break after the Meredith incident. He could use happy and normal (so could the viewers: his whining was driving me up the wall). I can't stop thinking about your show - it's incredible! Congratulations on your great work! Also, Izzie needs to go back to work at the hospital, and she definitely needs an awesome boyfriend (who won't cheat on her). Are Alex and Addison going to have an affair? There's a lot of heat between them! Please don't take that route - I know she would be the first woman to really get under his skin, but enough with the adultery on the show!

[Marcia]

Oh, and Shonda, if Rodrigo Santoro (the Brazilian god)does not get picked up by Lost, get him to at least guest star on Grey's! He would make the sexiest doctor ever (have you seen him on Love Actually?)! If a surgeon looking like that in glasses approached, I wouldn't even need any anesthesia. :)

[Sam]

I'm always a little surprised to read comments from people who threaten to stop watching if something happens/doesn't happen. Aren't we all here for the ride? The bumpy, crazy, wonderful ride? It's great to debate whether a character should do/not do something, what we would do in similar situations, etc., but isn't that the point of great, really, really great TV or literature or movies -- to make us think, to question, to wonder what we would do if faced with the same situation? It's those situations -- some we love, some we approve of, some we hate, some we don't care about -- that create opportunities to "live" the story.

Thank you Grey's for creating such real and interesting characters and building stories with so many compelling twists and turns. My choice to watch your wonderful show is not and will never be based on one situation -- it's based on, overall, how engaged I am with the stories and I have to say that not since Sex & the City has a show drawn me in the way Grey's does.

This wonderful blog about faith has me thinking about so many different ways the story could go and I can't wait to see where you all take us. Maybe it will be as I hope, maybe it will be even better, or maybe it will take a different turn. I'll be tuning in -- religiously -- to find out. Can't wait!

[Melissa]

First of all, I love the fact that you guys are blogging Season 1. I need all the help I can get, seeing as this is the first time I've seen these episodes. I only started watching Grey's Anatomy since the post-Superbowl episode, and while I have read the write-ups, it's nothing like seeing every tiny little detail of the episodes. Since I started watching after Addison was here, I've gotten a different view of their situation. I applaud McDreamy for trying to make it work with his wife... but I also desperately want things to work out between him and Meredith. It's going to be hard for Derek, no matter who he chooses... I'm just hoping that it's Mer.

[Jackie in Toronto]

Dear Eric,

You obviously don't know much about women. We keep trying to make things work, and when we're in love, we keep hoping that love will be enough to get us through difficult times. We also know that's it's important to forgive people.

That said, if you are saying that you writers are never going to get Mer and Der together... THEN I AM NEVER GOING TO FORGIVE YOU AND I WILL STOP WATCHING THIS SHOW!!!!! (great as it is...part what's great about it is that it's real and real love isn't always perfect and sweetness and light, sometimes it has challenges.)

AS an earlier poster said, Mer/Der have everything it takes to be a power couple on your show (looks, heat, humour, sex!) so don't mess with you loyal fan base by dragging out the soap opera. Put the star-crossed lovers together already!

Is it clear that you post really p***** me off?
But I'll forgive you if you make things right for Mer/Der!

[Anna]

First off let me tell you the kind of fan I am. I am completely obsessed. Like I look for things the characters wear and then I get it. For example the LL Bean bag Meredith carries, the Ugg shoes she wore in an episode and that also Cristina wore. I have Meredith's haircut. I have the coffee mug that Izzie has. My bathroom is full of lavender products. I have the soundtrack, season 1 on DVD, and all of season 2 on tape. I have the Dr. McDreamy shirt, and I ordered the calander (which I haven't gotten yet and am semi annoyed about) Recently I told my manager that I can't work Thursdays because I have classes at night. I do have classes...but in the morning. Although I do have DVR, I have to watch it when it first airs. Do you know why I am so obsessed? It's because of Meredith and Derek. I know you have heard this hundreds of times, but they truly are the reason why I love this show, and if they don't get back together, I might not be so hellbent on making sure I have Thursday nights free. TIVO/DVR really could be the ruin of Grey's ratings, especially if there is no movement. I will never stop watching, but I am afraid it will no longer be my top priority, and I will let my DVR do the work, and I will watch when I get the chance. I know threatening not to watch is not going to change anything, but I am just afraid for my favorite show. I don't watch CSI, but apparently a lot of people do. Please give your fans what they want!!

[Tisa]

That just gave me a whole new perspective, thank you.
It's all still perfect.

[Shannon]

Faith. Okay, Eric. I will have faith. Just don't pull a Mcdreamy on me and take my faith in you, this fabulous show, away. After what you shared with us in the finale, please don't take that away. I waited all through season 2 in agony, to get rewarded in the finale with Mer and Der. People are flawed and can't analyze their life and choices as easily as others looking in. Derek is in love with Meredith. Meredith is in love with Derek. That I have faith in. Please, say you all do too?

[a]

The whole country fell in love with Season 1 Mer/Der. The whole country waited patiently the first half of season 2. Then you started trashing Mer's character, making Derek into an (almost) unredeemable a-s-s and making Addison have personality swings that rival the craziest person in the psych ward. I want Mer to have Derek work to earn her trust. Let her be in control. The trashing of her character was tough to take but she can overcome it early in S3. Then, they can get back together on her terms. PLEASE!

[PamelaJaye]

Thanks again for blogging.

I've found something that lessens the withdrawal slightly: I've dug out my old Ally McBeal tapes and I'm dubbing them to DVD. I'm still on season 1.

The thing is -- when Georgia looks at Billy complaining to John about dating Ally, an associate all I can think is "well, she might just as well be dating a vet."

There is nothing new under the sun. But that doesn't mean I don't love it just as much the second time around.

Thank you for bringing back those feelings.

(oh, but btw, Billy wasn't half the jerk Derek is being -- even if we all know just how hard it is for Derek to hold himself back (or at least *I* know) I'm still waiting for my wonderful, no dialog, elevator scene. I have no idea which episode it was in, so I'll probably have to wade thru one or two more seasons to find it. When I get there, I am sure, I will think of Mer and Der, and Patrick's brilliance in saying there should be no dialog.

[Dar]

I am definately in the minority in that I never saw the relationship between meredith and Derek as anything but a sexual attraction. NOT love. NOT destiny. NOT fated to be "happily every after."

I hope in season three Mer learns the difference between drunken lust and love; Derek can decide independantly about his commitment to his marriage, but Meredith should not be factor.

And maybe she sees some of the parallels between her decisions and those that her mother made.

[PamelaJaye]

>That ended with that sex thing that YOU GUYS wrote, much to our surprise. OMG, Derek seeed to be making a choice, a decision!!!!

Derek wouldn't know a decision if he tripped over one.

I love and all that. I understand about temptation, but really -- all those people who say *Meredith* is spineless??? Derek's not the one wit h a challenging internship, a mother who never cared for him (her?) even when he recognized him/her and a childhood completely devoid of love from a male parent.

Derek needs to fill Dr Cox's prescription (it's always for "two testicles") and go get a job at Mercy West, and leave Meredith the h*** alone (I'll edit myself this time)

But if he did that,we'd lose so much of what is so great and conflicted and (romantic?) and heartbreaking about this show.

And that would be

Bad.

Having said that, could we have a little more of the Smart/Caring Meredith Figures Out How to Help the Patient? After all those years of Ally, I'm all for the brilliant at work/stupid in love female heroine.

I do feel sorrty for Finn, though. He's just as much the innocent bystander that Mer was in season one (sleeping with your superiors notwithstanding)

If people care enough to get all mad when the show doesn't follow their desires, hey, at last they're not apathetic. (and even if I *were* pathetic: heck, I still watch ER. I'm just not invested as I am here)

[Bay]

I'm sorry, that's just beautiful. Beautiful writing, yes. Beautiful television, OH, yes. Thank you for this program. Thank you for the re-runs and re-blogs. Thank you. I'm incoherent with gratitude.

--Bay
(I thought I would have to make do with reading poetry this summer -- I'm so glad I'm wrong.)

[promerder]

Honestly, I thought that this show was better than resorting to stupid ploys to keep the love birds on the show apart.I am still going to remain positive for now, and keep the faith, that you guys are different. If you keep meredith and derek apart you will kill the show for probably half of your viewers, if not more. I know that you cannot afford to do that. There are millions of storylines that you could do for meredith and derek together, showing how a couple in a relationship manages life working together in a hospital with a hectic pace. If they are not together or in the process of being together by eppi 5, this viewer is tuning in to CSI.And I really don't want to do that because I love my people on grey's!

[Sidewinder]

Wow. Brilliant. I, aspiring writer, am in awe at what you guys (and gals) do every episode. That concept spread over several episodes was so amazing to fully realize. I finally understand what "that's not enough" was really supposed to mean. It's such a pity "save me" and "raindrops" were split into two seasons. I am going to be wondering for eternity, "How do you people do that?"

[Sarah and Lauren]

BUT- He DOES dance in public!(Refer to episode Losing My Religion)

[Andrea]

Okay, I was just watching 17 seconds and I hit the part where Meredith goes to Finn's house and they hug and she says, "I do, I love him so much." and I have no idea whether she is talking about Derek or Doc so yea... by the way awesome writing, amazing characters. I love this show so much I almost want to be a surgeon. Thanks!
Andrea

[Lise]

I've quite had it with the mer/der fairytale. I don't care anymore if it has a bad ending. Let Burke and Cristina be the main love couple. They're so much cuter together! So please writers, give them a little more attention. Write a blog about them and end the whole Mer/Der/Addi/Mark/Finn thing. It's annoying and so unrealistic!

[Brieana]

Very powerful note there. I agree, it would be hard to trust him again but somehow you have to hang on to that faith. Mer and Der have to end up together, it is so meant to be. On another note, the episode "Save Me" is my favorite episode, I think it reaches you and moves in some way. I watch that episode more than any of the others (even though the others are great too) on the Season One DVD, can't wait for the Season Two DVD.

[Angela]

Seriously-- maybe I'm weird-- but I will quit watching the show if you DO put Meredith and Derek back together. The whole thing has been drug out so long that I don't like either one of them anymore. THe best thing that can happen is if Addison and Meredith both tell him where he can go, and Meredith grows up and finds a mature relationship-- i.e., not one based on sex.

[Fernanda, mad mad!!!!]

Stop doing this! Come on! We are not dumb enough not to know that Merder is going to happen! They are the real thing, no matter how much I hate that, that I hate Derek (McDreamy yeah right! he is not a prince charming! He has done everything the wrong way!), that I hate Meredith (too whiny) and what they have done, I know that in Shonda's mind, they are the real love, so stop doing this for the sake of Merders (who would have thought I was going to say that!) but hey, come on! just stop.

And for the record, I don't believe in fairytales, I did when I was a kid, but life is about real things that are as rich as the fairytales are, real love, life has its perks. We don’t need more fairytales.

And please, accept the fact that some of us adore Addison, we really absolutely adore Addie. So stop ignoring that she is there, because after all that wasn’t our decision, you put her there, now accept that we love her more that any other character.

BTW, when Meredith said it’s not enough, I cracked up, seriously, because a lie that big is not something you just let pass for pretty words.

Adios!