From Shonda Rhimes (FINALLY)…

So Denny Duquette died at 7:42 Monday evening.

Actually, he died once on the East coast and once again on the West coast and I’m pretty sure he’s going to die many more times on many more continents pretty damned soon.

I cried. When Denny died, I cried. I cried when I wrote the script page where Denny dies. I cried when we had the read through and the cast found out that Denny dies. I cried when Mark Tinker filmed Denny dying. I cried when Ed Ornelas edited Denny’s death. I cried watching them mix the song playing during Denny’s death. I’m a freaking crybaby when it comes to Denny.

I choose to blame editor Ed Ornelas for Denny’s death. Like I had nothing to do with it. Like I was an innocent bystander in the whole thing. Like it wasn’t me wrote it. I’d sit behind him in the editing room and sob into a tissue while saying kindly, supportive things to the back of Ed’s head. Things like “Denny Murderer! Dog Killer!!! DENNY-MURDERING-DOG-KILLER!!!”

I didn’t kill Denny. Ed did.

Right.

Look, I honestly have nothing to say for myself. No words in my own defense. Except I told you guys that the characters have to do what the characters have to do. I mean, I love Denny. Really love him. He was my “you jump, I jump” guy. He was my imaginary future husband. He was the guy I was dating in my head. HE WAS ALL I HAD. And now he’s dead. God, I feel so Izzie in this moment.

But the point is, Denny was always going to die. His character was created to die. I knew it. Jeffrey Dean Morgan knew it. And as much as I wanted Denny NOT to die when the time came, as much Jeffrey Dean Morgan wanted to NOT die when the time came, as much as Channing Dungey (our super cool studio executive ) begged me to not to hurt her Denny…

…it was his time. He had a stroke. He died. I had nothing to do with it. It was his time.

People die. Suddenly. Without warning. When you least expect it. People die. And it’s horrible and painful and utterly shocking but…it happens. And I wanted to present that on the show.

The good thing is – and you’re all yelling “GOOD THING? GOOD THING?!!!” – but, yes, there is a good thing in all of this. And that good thing is what Camille says to Richard. “I’ve been loved. I’ve been loved. That’s something everyone should feel once in their life.” Denny has been loved. And he dies knowing he was loved. And knowing that he loved back.

I named this episode “Losing My Religion” because, to me, that is what happens to each intern in this episode. Each intern lets go of the things they’ve held onto all season. George lets go of loving Meredith. Cristina lets go of her well-checked emotions. Izzie is forced to let go of her idealism. And that leads to her letting go of medicine. Alex lets go of his rage against Izzie. And Meredith…well, Meredith just lets go.

I don’t want to talk too much about the Mer/Der of it all because we are clearly hanging on a cliff here and anything I say may tell you what’s on the other side. And you know I hate spoilers. But I do feel like we’ve tried to make their relationship complex. Derek’s flawed and sometime you hate him. Meredith’s flawed and sometimes you hate her. And you can’t help but root for Addison to be happy. And you like Finn cause he births ponies and he has plans. And clearly poor Doc was a metaphor for the Mer/Der relationship and when Doc’s put down, it feels like a horrible, painful but necessary ending. But still…when Derek grabs Meredith and kisses her…it’s such a relief. You want them to figure this thing out.

I do want to talk about the costumes (done beautifully by Mimi the costume goddess). Everyone dresses up for the prom. But then we lose Denny. And here’s something you maybe don’t notice until all our interns are gathered in the room with Izzie who lies on the bed with Denny’s body: the prom clothes are actually mourning clothes. Funeral clothes. Suddenly, you see that Meredith and George and Cristina and Callie and Alex are all dressed, not for a prom, but for a funeral. Everyone in dark colors, everyone dressed somberly. As if they were in mourning. Only Izzie is in happy pink. Only Izzie looks like she didn’t know this was coming. In the last scene, Mark Tinker shot this gorgeous shot of Izzie walking down the stairs, Alex and George behind her. I love that shot. Izzie has this fallen queen thing going on that I just adore.

Speaking of the prom…dudes, I so wanted this prom. I’ve wanted this prom since the beginning of the season. We’d been planning for it and obsessing about it. Because, first of all, I like seeing men in suits. Second, these interns and their lives remind me so much of high school in all the best ways. I hope you’ve noticed that. I hope you got the Breakfast Club of it all when they give their speeches to the Chief. Cause I’m an 80’s girl and I needed my prom.

Burktina: this episode is one of my favorites for both Burke and Cristina. If you look at where they began at the beginning of Season Two and how far they’ve come…. You just hate Cristina. You hate her when she walks away from Burke after seeing that he know has a hand tremor. And then you see her give that speech to the Chief (which by the way, Sandra Oh did brilliantly and perfectly EVERY SINGLE TAKE) and you see the struggle. Her struggle to suppress all of her humanity in pursuit of perfection. And in my mind, what we realize is that she is not cold. She is terrified. Scared that if she lets her emotions out, they will overtake her and she will be hurt. And you can’t hate her. Because it’s so incredibly human and understandable. There’s that moment when Burke tells Cristina that he won’t bear a grudge and it’s so sad because he means it. He doesn’t believe she has it in her to stay by his side. And then Denny dies and Cristina watches Izzie grieving and realizes that she has no other option but to go to Burke and cover his hand with her own. Because you can lose someone if you’re not careful.

There’s more to say but I know y’all are itching for me to post this blog. So I’ll do another one later in the week. Because we still have to talk about the Chief and about Burke’s tremors and George and Callie’s thing and so much more…

One last thing: Thank you so much for watching the show. I’ve been in New York for the network upfronts and it’s been amazing to hear from fans how much they enjoy the show. It means a lot to me and all of us who work on Grey’s. You may have heard we are moving to Thursday night. I’m thrilled because Thursday is a big day for TV and I love a challenge and I’ve got my fingers and toes crossed that you’ll follow us to our new night.

Comments

[Disa]

Shonda! Big love to you and your show! Thank you! (especially for Mer/Der- I SO needed that :)) /17 girl in Sweden

[Natalie]

I think that I've pretty much said everything that I thought about the episode to my friends, parents, and co-workers... I just wanted to be the first to write a comment.

Ok, wait, there is somthing that I want to say. I wish Sunday night's episode was the finale. It just had that whole Kimberly Shaw pulling off her wig drama. That's it.

[Tiner]

You know, I was really surprised Monday night. I didn't really cry. I don't know why. Maybe I am post PMS or something. But this blog made my cry. And now I can't stop. I am actually typing through tears without seeing the sceen. This episode WAS so sad. I am mourning everything. Denny, Doc, Finn, Addison, and even the series. What will I do all summer? WIll they run reruns? I can only hope. I hope the writers at Grey's appreciate all this talent that they have. It truly is a gift from God.

[Jane P.]

Hi - I am glad to read this blog b/c it gave me some insight into the final episode of the season, which I did not get from watching it. Even so, after watching the last episode of the season, I was confused. I truly did not understand how a show that hooked me with its sense of fun and sometimes subtle/sometimes overt humor could end an otherwise impressive season awash in more sadness and depression than I've seen on television in a long time. There was no sense of joy, fun or humor in this episode. In fact, for the first time ever, I am not anxiously awaiting the next episode. As a faithful, loyal, enthusiastic fan of this tremendous show, I found myself at a complete loss at the end of the episode. And, it wasn't just Denny's death. It was every single subplot/storyline running through the episode -- I cannot imagine it being any more bleak than it was. Denny, the dog, Meredith/Derek/Addison/Finn, Izzie, Burke, Burke and Christina, the Chief's niece and wife . . . Where was the joy, the hopeful optimism the fans of the show have been able to take from each prior episode?? I used to turn the television off after each episode of the show with a smile on my face and a light heart, grateful for having escaped reality for another hour! At the end of this episode, I had a very, very heavy heart. I don't know if I'll watch this show next season. Maybe the writers will recover their joie de vive over the summer??

[Augusta]

Dear Shonda,

Thank you for such an amazing season. I could not have asked for a better show, season, finale and most of all, insight into the humaness of all the characters I've come to love. Thank you for sticking to what you think is right, thank you for giving me fun drama to look forward to, thank you for making me laugh, cry, exhilerated and outraged all at the same time. I have never encountered such a powerful and moving show. I loved the scene with the Chief and each intern, I hated Denny's death and felt happy that he passed peacefully at the same time. My heart poured out for Meredith and Derek, both trying to move on, both still deeply in love, both tremendously hurt and lonely without the other. Thank you for letting them begin to face their relationship, even though it was inappropriate, but very human. To all of the writers, please enjoy your vacation, take a breather because we the fans expect big things when you come back, we need you to be fresh and ready to continue the beautiful show you have given us. To all the actors, thank you. To all the supporting crew, thank you. I look forward to the fall and the continuation of this fabulous show. Thank you agian.

[Heather]

Okay, SERIOUSLY!

I love you Shonda. You are my hero. Grey's Anatomy is by far the best show on television!

The writing is so beautifully written, and I enjoy watching it! I swear I cried several times. Poor Denny. But I agree that it was his time....And instead of blaming you for killing him, I will blame Ed too! hahaha jk!

I cant wait to hear more about the finale!

[cookie]

thursday is favorite night of the week NOW!

[Megan]

I know you aren't into the spoilers...but I hope to god Izzy is NOT leaving!!! please please just say it aint so!!!!

[Cassie]

I love love love this show. I don't always love everything that happens, but that is life. And the show is so much like life....except that everyone is beautiful and has straight white teeth. I hope all you writers have a great summer and prepare all kinds of wonderful stuff for next season.

[ElizabethB]

one word.
amazing.

this show.
your characters.
your writing.
the production.
the story.
the character development.
the themes.

Everything about this show is Right. And it's been a very long time since I've found a show that's "right".

Thank you.
You've made it all worthwhile.
:)

[Cerstin]

It's true. Denny had to die. From the moment I fell in love with him, I realized that I would lose him some time soon. Sure the moment was terrible, and I cried, and I wanted to throw my shoe at the television screen, but it somehow felt right. So thank you Shonda and you're team for sharing beautiful characters like Denny with us, and for inspiring youngsters like me to just be...human.

[Ari]

Thanks for posting finally... I've been waiting for your post forever! I think I'm one of the few that like Mer/Der (even though I feel torn since he's still married) and I hope you do right with them and not torture them or us like this past season... and not pull a Ross and Rachel on them either.

[amy]

Shondra - just a big thank you for bringing this show to our lives! It's my favorite show and I don't know what I'll do this summer!

[iloveDENNY]

omg am i first comment??? jeffrey dean morgan=love

[Christine]

Shonda
Thanks for a great season!!!Me or my Tvio will be following you to Thursday.

[Nikki from MD]

AHH Shonda we have been dying to hear your version of this!

Where to begin.. wow what an amazing episode, its days later and I am still in shock.

Well you were right, you told us millions and millions of mer/der fans to have faith, and honestly we doubted it until now. I have to admit I am not sure how I feel about them having sex. Granted, it was HOT HOT HOT and I watched the last 15 minutes about 10 times already, I even got up this morning before work and watched it again. (can you say obsessed?) My concern with this whole thing is that they are no better than Addison/Mark now, I was hoping for them to actually talk about their feelings rather than act on them (atleast until the divorce is final, then I want them to go at it all the time, they are ELECTRIC) . WE ALL want to hear Derek actually tell Meredith that he loves her, wait not just tell her but show her by oh, I dont know, holding a radio over his head, or giving her the last piece of cheesecake... I think alot of us are concerned because Meredith has already been through so much, made so many mistakes, and been called a "whore", I dont want that to go down as another mistake. Although McVet is a sweetheart and a cutie and I dont want him to get hurt, and although I am TEAM MER/DER all the way, Its hard not to like Addison, just not with McDreamy. I TRULY hope that we get to see a broken-hearted, tore up Der pining for Mer for awhile ( or more than we already have ) the way she did when he went back to Addison. He needs to fully understand what he did to her. You did say that everything always comes back around right? IM DYING to know who Mer chooses, I hope its no one at that point and she goes home to support Izzie, then Izzie, George, and Mer have a good roommate bonding time. Oh and GO MER calling out Dr. Webber about the affair with her mother. Poor Doc, bawled my eyes out with that one.

As for Christina and Burke, WOW! I am intrigued by this couple as well. I am so anxious to see how this pans out.

Izzie/Denny, again bawled my eyes out, I felt so bad for her. Crossing the fingers and toes that KH doesnt leave the show.. impossible right??????

Keep up the great work Shonda, we all LOVE YOU!!! Please keep the blogs coming, its going to be a LONNNNNG 4 months without something new. THANK GOD FOR RE-RUNS.

Also, you should (if you havent already) checked out the abc ga messageboards!

[Laura]

I just wanted to say wow. I was blown away by this episode. By this program. I was almost forced to watch it for a Television Criticism class and now I love it. I thought I would hate it from working so closely with it but I love it.

And I just wanted to say I DID notice the funeral feel, and the Breakfast Club feel, and the feel of everything. It's my job to look at the small things about Grey's Anatomy. Well maybe not job, but it certianly is a grade.

[Layton]

Well, I was starting to worry that we were never going to get to hear from you Shonda. I do hope you'll post more later in the week cause I never tire of hearing your insight.

Anyways, excellent job - I certainly cried. I told my friends that the genius of it all comes from y'all's ability to make us believe that something we thought was inevitable isn't after all - only to do it anyways. It was painful to watch Denny die after you gave him an out - and painful to watch Mer/Der after you finally had me convinced that she could be with Finn. But it was life. Or at least - it was the best imitation of life I've seen on TV. Good work.

[Jamie]

Greys = <3

[Andromachie]

Thank you, Rhonda. I loved the episode and absolutely adored the scene when Izzy is walking down the stairs. I thought she looked like a bride-to-be, flanked by her two best men.

Can't wait for season 3.

[Heidi]

I think u need a hug
{{{{{ Shonda}}}}}

[Erika]

I understand why you killed Denny, but it still hurts. I understand that people die suddenly in life, and it's heartbreaking and tragic and a zillion other adjectives that come down to "just plain sucky" -- but sometimes, in life, people end up happy too. Please, please, PLEASE, in the next season, try to remember that people can end up happy.

[Glory]

Thabnk You Shonda for such an amazing season! I'll watch your show till the very end, and you can count on that!

[gretchen]

Loved the Breakfast Club reference, loved that final scene of Izzie in her room. Denny obviously had to die; it was sad, but he was doomed as soon as Izzie said yes. Most of all, love the blog. Thanks for engaging so substantively with all of us viewers.

[Jessica]

Shonda - we LOVE the show! We don't just "enjoy" it - we SAVOR it! I want SO BADLY to rewatch that last episode, but its not for sale or view with the other ABC shows - why??? HELP US, Shonda!! We need to see it again!